Posts Tagged ‘John Cena’

Smackdown [December 27, 2013]

December 27, 2013

0 - smackdown new logo April 2013

The last Smackdown of 2013 was a breakout moment for Seth Rollins.

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10-22-12 WWE RAW

October 22, 2012

this was no go-home show… this was the soap opera on AJ Lee’s life…

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Did this segment sell you on SummerSlam?

August 9, 2011

Let us know in the comment section!

Cena on Twitter a few moments ago…

July 18, 2011

From John Cena’s Twitter accout:

“I have just been ‘future endeavored’. Well..if that’s how it is I would like to take a moment to publicly apologize to Dwayne ‘the Rock’ Johnson. In an effort to make WM28 as big as possible I tried to expose rock for his flaws. Very childish and immature on my behalf. My comments about the rocks absence were both unprofessional and childish. I am sorry. Rock, I truly wish and still hope in my heart of Hearts that the crazy old man who is the boss reconsiders his totally rash decision. Because chicago was insane last night And it made me think.of what Miami could have been. I guess sometimes u do not know what u have until it is lost. CeNation. I very rarely ask u for anything but I am down to my last chance. If u could tweet WWE to let them know not to fire me I would be indebted to u all. Im not saying its gonna work but sometimes they can not ignore the universe.”

I can’t believe they are actually going to try this “fired” angle again. Lets see how long this one lasts…

 

Money in the Bank Live Updates

July 17, 2011

superluchas.net

Join us tonight at 5pm for live coverage and updates of WWE’s Money in the Bank pay per view. Will CM Punk walk away with the WWE title? Will he take that hideous spinning belt and change it back to its original glory? Come back and find out!

And we’re off!

SmackDown Money in the Bank Ladder Match

Daniel Bryan defeats Kane, Sheamus, Sin Cara,  Cody Rhodes, Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel and Heath Slater

  • Sin Cara comes out in white and gold!
  • Sheamus just murdered Sin Cara with a powerbomb from the apron onto the ladder!
  • Kane drops Sheamus with a chokeslam on a ladder.
  • Bryan puts Cody in a guillotine, then kicks Wade Barrett down the ladder. He goes up and takes down the briefcase for the win.
  • HUGE DANIEL BRYAN chants from Chicago!

Great Puma: Match was hot from the start. The four consecutive out of the ring dives was an amzing touch. The stunts just got bigger and more spectacular every minute. Kudos to all wrestlers involved and congrats to Daniel Bryan!

Mascara de Fuego: Great match and a greater outcome! Couldn’t ask for anything different! So good.

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Chavo Guerrero drops truth bombs on Super Cena

July 17, 2011

On the day of one of the biggest WWE pay per views in recent history, Chavo Guerrero tweeted an insightful and poignant plea to John Cena to bring his A game and to not be lazy in his match with CM Punk tonight. You can read the letter in its entirety after the jump. Here’s a juicy excerpt from Chavo’s message to John Cena:

Eddie & I taught u different..We never said “get lazy” & do the same thing every night. We always said” think out of the box” & give the fans what they deserve & not rely On the “machine”to ” get u over”. I hope this lights a fire under your ass & U deliver this Sunday.

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Over the Limit Live Updates!

May 22, 2011

Join here at FighterHayabusa.com for live updates to WWE’s Over the Limit Pay Per View!

Nice tribute to Macho Man Randy Savage at the beginning of the broadcast.

R-Truth pins Rey Mysterio

Truth comes out to NO music whatsoever.

Truth cuts a promo on Seattle, Rey, Little Jimmy and toy masks. Lovely.

Rey with a sick rana off the apron.

Truth hits the mic check after working over Rey on the outside.

Great Puma: Great match. Very gritty and both men made each other look solid. Glad Truth is on the up and up.

Mascara De Fuego: Good opener I think they finally showed that they mean business with Truth. I think this got him over in a big way.

The Miz cuts a promo in the back. He’s going to make Cena quit. He’s going to prove the naysayers wrong.

United States Title Match

Ezekial Jackson defeats Wade Barrett via DQ

Ezekial clamps on the Torture Rack and out comes the Corre.

Great Puma: Decent match with a predictable ending. Ezekial looked strong.

Mascara De Fuego: I was bored but I guess they got over Jackson as a power house. I don’t like the multiple body slams from Jackson as a “signature move”.

Hilarious backstage segment with CM Punk, Batista Mason Ryan and the New Nexus.

Otunga and McGillicutty are layed out via Kane and Big Show and Punk tells them to “walk it off.”

Sin Cara pins Chavo Guerrero

Sin Cara pulls off a flying headscissors out of nowhere to catch Chavo.

Mascara De Fuego: I don’t know felt slow and sloppy like they didn’t go over this shit before the match. I don’t think this match got off the ground. Too bad.

Great Puma: Not a good match from a ring work standpoint. Lot’s of sloppy offense that Chavo tried his best to embellish.

Christian and Randy Orton have an interview together backstage.

  • Christian says he’s not bitter and he’s going to win his title back.
  • Orton gives Christian respect but he’s going to beat Christian again.

Alberto Del Rio comes out to the ring.

  • He talks about sneaky Canadiens crossing the border, coffee houses and his destiny.
  • He says he could make Cena and the Miz quit with his Cross Arm Breaker.

Big Show & Kane come out.

Kane says he’s disappointed that the rapture didn’t come yesterday. Awesome!

They intimidate ADR out of the ring.

Big Show & Kane defeat The New Nexus (CM Punk & Mason Ryan)

  • Punk is taking  a beating but manages to do a little homage to the Macho Man.
  • Double Chokeslam on Ryan for the win.

Great Puma: Okay match. Ryan dominated during his time in the ring while Punk barely survived when he was tagged in. I wished they pulled the trigger on turning Ryan against the New Nexus.

Mascara De Fuego: Take CM Punk out of this match and it would have been a horrible match. Punk says what he can in this one. Good Macho Man tribute by Punk.

They air a horrible commercial hyping their next pay per view, Capital Punishment. Ugggh. I smell a few new writers in the back.

Divas Championship

Brie Bella pins Kelly Kelly

The Bellas pull off the old switcharoo again as Nikki hits the Acid Drop on Kelly Kelly.

Great Puma: Really disappointed there was no Kharma tonight.

Masacara De Fuego: Yeah,  this shit was too long and didn’t go how we thought it was… whatever. Twin magic, facebuster, pin.

World Heavyweight Championship

Randy Orton pins Christian

  • Great back and forth match. The crowd finally came alive and supplied dueling chants throughout the match.
  • Orton does Colt Cabana’s Billy Goat’s Curse that Christian managed to get out of!
  • The counters in this match are unreal. I am loving this match. This match is making this pay per view.
  • Orton hits an RKO for the win after Christian wiggled out of a belly to back suplex.

Great Puma: Too many great things to mention about this match. Certainly match of the night. Wish they gave it to Christian since the match was so epic.

Mascara De Fuego: The match that saved the pay per view, woke up this crowd and finally didn’t make me regret ordering this shit. Great back and forth match, these dudes had great chemistry and put on a really solid showing.

Kiss My Foot Match

Jerry The King Lawler pins Michael Cole

Cole comes out and says he can’t wrestle due to injury. The ref rips up Cole’s doctor’s note and the match begins.

Second Rope Fist Drop and it’s over.

Lawler invites Eve and Jim Ross to the ring. Eve kills Cole with a moonsault and Jim Ross dumps BBQ Sauce in Cole’s mouth. Very nice payoff.

The Best there Ever Will Be, Bret Hart comes out and backs Cole into the ring to kiss Jerry Lawler’s foot. Bret puts on the Sharpshooter!

Great Puma: Let’s hope that’s the last we see of Michael Cole. Good payoff with Eve, Jim Ross and Bret Hart getting their revenge.

Mascara De Fuego: Finally the payoff they should have done months ago! Lawler squashes Cole then humiliates him. Too bad this wont take Cole off TV for a while like it should.

I Quit Match

The Miz vs. John Cena

They try to do the Mankind finish with Alex Riley’s phone but the ref reverses the decision.

The ref restarts the match, Cena hulks up and makes the Miz say “I quit” after few belts to the back. Boo.

Great Puma: If it wasn’t for Christian vs. Orton, this PPV would have been a total turd. Superman Cena wins again.

Mascara De Fuego: A snuff match for S&M is all this was. That’s all I have to say about that.

That’s it for tonight, folks. Stay tuned for MDF’s Over the Limit review. No podcast tonight – we’re never inspired by pay per views with only one great match. Have a great week and thanks for visiting.

05-16-11 WWE RAW RANT

May 17, 2011

Sorry for the late post folks, I went out to see THOR. Good stuff if you’re into the Comic book movies.

Coffee favored Patron is poured now let’s get into this…

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05-09-11 WWE RAW REVIEW

May 9, 2011

Right off the bat Ricardo Rodriguez is introducing Alberto Del Rio who drives out in a Rolls Royce. ADR comes to the ring and reminds us what his name is. He says his destiny was stolen by that coward Edge and says we wasted a lot of time last week with the Rock’s celebration. He says there is no one better than him and its he who should face Cena. This brings out Rey Mysterio and says his destiny is to be Ricardo Rodriguez’ announcer and then challenges ADR tonight, winner getting Cena. Before ADR can finish his though The Miz and Smackdown’s Alex Riley come out, Miz talks shit about Smackdown and says this is still his show and blames Riley for the shit that happened last week. ADR says Miz had his moment and he didn’t get the job done and now he goes to the back of the line. Miz doesn’t like this shit and says he DID get the job done last week and that the ref was incompetent and tells Rey and ADR to fight in a Taco Bell parking lot. Ha. R-Truth then comes out with no music, he says he hates hospital food and that Morrison is eating a whole lot of that right now because what he did to him. He then says he doesn’t care if the guys in the ring all share the same bed pan and cuts then all down individually. He tells us when an angry black man is talking, we need to shut up…. We get an email… the GM says he only sees three who deserve this match so we’re getting a triple threat, Miz vs. Del Rio vs…. then we get another email…. The third person is… Rey Mysterio. Truth doesn’t take this shit too well and goes off and gets in the face of Rey. Mysterio says Truth should be in the match and that’s “what’s up”. Ha. The crowd gives Truth the “hey hey hey goodbye” chant while he walks off. Miz gets back on the mic and says ADR and Rey are day laborers on RAW. Haha Before Miz can say he will be the next WWE Champion, Rodriguez says Alberto Del Rio’s name. This causes shit to break down with Riley, Rodriguez, Miz and ADR beating on each other. Rey waits his turn and dives onto ADR on the outside before celebrating in the ring.

Well, lets see how this goes… cool that its these three guys and not old hat but Cena isn’t going to lose the title right now so it doesn’t fucking matter.

Diva’s Champion Brie & Nicki Bella vs. Eve & Kelly Kelly

-Brie and Nicki with hot tags while keeping Kelly in the ring.

-Kelly fights back with the flying head scissors, a smack in the ass and a somersault to the corner to Brie.

-Kelly gets the roll up and pins Brie… or Nicki.

Winner: Kelly Kelly & Eve

Right after the match Kharma comes out to the ring slowly. The Bella’s hide at ringside while Eve and Kelly look on. The Bella’s then run up the ramp. Kelly goes to the outside while Eve gets the clothesline. Kharma then runs off Kelly and heads back in the ring to finish off Eve with an implant buster. They are definitely doing a good job getting her over.

WWE Tag Team Champions Kane and Big Show do the walk backstage, oh great we get another Mason Ryan match… sigh.

Mason Ryan w/CM Punk vs. Kane w/Big Show

-Ryan over powers Kane but Kane fights out with a flurry of punches in the corner.

-stiff clothesline by Ryan before choking Kane with the 2nd rope.

-snake eyes and a powerslam my Ryan for a 2 count.

-dropkick to the leg then head of Ryan.

-Punk kicks the leg of Kane which causes Show to knock out Punk at ringside.

-the rest of Nexus then comes in and attacks for the DQ.

-the tag champions fight them off and clear the ring last hitting a double chokeslam on Ryan.

Winner: Kane by DQ

Santino Marella vs. Dolph Ziggler w/Vicki Guerrero

-Ziggler looks so vanilla now, he’s not even wearing the same tights anymore, just black tights and while boots.

-Ziggler starts strong punching the shit out of Santino.

-high elbow drop by Ziggler who’s treating Santino like a jobber.

-Santino tries to fight back and goes for the cobra but gets hit by a standing drop kick.

-Zig Zag puts away Santino.

Winner: Dolph Ziggler

 

They recap the bullshit on Smackdown where Christian loses the World Title to Randy Orton.

Truth in the back still talking to himself. That new backstage guy stops him, Truth makes fun of the fans wanting him to go back to singing and dancing. He says no more of that shit and bounces.

Zack Ryder (oh shit, yeah on RAW) and he’s showing Cena how to fist bump before he does the walk.

Miz and Riley in the back watching the footage from last week. Riley tries to defend himself but Miz isn’t having it. Riley keeps apologizing but Miz keeps cutting him down. Riley says he’s going to make it up to Miz and walks off.

They then follow Riley in the back walking, he then comes out to the arena and gets into the ring. He gets on the mic and says he only cares about the Miz and is going to prove it to Miz by challenging John Cena to a match. It takes Cena a while but he finally comes out.

WWE Champion John Cena vs. Alex Riley

-Cena showboats Riley by showing him up on… wrestling moves…?

-Riley finally gets a stiff clothesline for a 2 count.

-Cena does his typical move set that leads into the YCSM fist drop.

-AA on Riley but Cena is too busy staring at Miz who comes out.

-another AA to Riley then the STF for the win.

Winner: John Cena

Miz looks on and Cena does his usual after match bullshit. I wish this dude was actually on Smackdown now. I fucking hate having to review his ass.

WrestleMania comes out tomorrow on Blu-ray and DVD bitches!

Michael Cole is in the ring after the break, he’s retiring from in-ring competition after beating Lawler twice on ppv. He says he’s retiring undefeated. Lawler comes into the ring but Cole says The King cant touch him or he’ll be fired. Lawler cuts to the footage last week with Rock beating on Cole. Lawler challenges Cole with the stipulation that if he loses that he would induct Cole into the Hall of Fame himself and even give Cole his HOF ring. Cole says he doesn’t think so and goes back into his glass cage of human emotions. Cole is now pissed cause Lawler couldn’t let him retire in peace, cuts down Tennessee, Al Gore (putting over George W. Bush), Elvis and Lawler. Cole says he decided yesterday to retire from wrestling and how he and his mom watched WrestleMania over and over. Cole goes back to talking shit about Lawler and asked him what he did for mothers day. Cole plays up the asshole role again on Lawler’s mom. Lawler goes to attack Cole but Swagger attacks Lawler from behind taking him out with the ring post.

United States Champion Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger

-Swagger teases the ankle lock and Kofi almost hits the trouble in paradise shortly after the start of the match.

-flying forearm and a dropkick by Kofi sending Swagger to the outside.

-Swagger sidesteps Kofi, then rolls back into the ring and hits the high boot sending Kofi to the outside.

-Kofi hits a high cross body from the top for a close 2 ½.

-Kofi skins the cat but Swagger puts the ankle lock on Kofi while he is coming over.

-Swagger then works over the ankle of Kofi until he fights back trying to hit a tornado DDT.

-Lawler comes out from the back causing the distraction.

-Kofi hits the trouble in paradise for the pin.

Winner: Kofi Kingston

Lawler takes out Swagger then start to throw furniture into Cole’s glass box. Lawler then takes Cole’s tie from the hole in the box and bounces Coles he’s off the glass multiple times before just the refs come out to pull him off. Swagger comes over and checks on Cole while yelling how Lawler is now fired for touching Cole. Lawler says he only touched his tie. Swagger then accepts the match for Cole but Cole is freaking out about it. Lawler celebrates on the announce table.

Let’s hope this is the end of this shit finally… its run its course folks.

Triple Threat match to become the #1 contender

Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

-Rey fights off both Miz and ADR and teases a double 619.

-ADR sends Rey to the outside but then gets rolled up by Miz for a 2.

-Rey back in with a pin attempt that Miz breaks up.

-Miz hits the corner clothesline taking out both Rey and ADR.

-Rey goes for the 619 on Miz but ADR sweeps his legs from under him.

-ADR sends Rey to the outside, Miz goes for the SCF but ADR fights out and teases the arm breaker before we get a double clothesline spot and a commercial break.

-back from the break and ADR has cornered Rey and hits a tilt a whirl back breaker on him.

-Miz comes back in sending ADR to the outside but walks into a stiff kick to Miz’s head for a 2 ½.

-ADR pulls Miz to the outside and hits a clothesline on him by Rey comes over the top rope with a seated senton.

-Rey to the top with another seated senton on ADR in the ring and a HIGH cross body for a 2 count.

-Miz to the top but Rey sends ADR at him.

-Rey with the top rope hurricaneranna to Miz.

-arm breaker drop to Rey by ADR

-arm breaker on Rey!… Miz comes in and ADR rolls him up for a 2 count.

-short DDT by Miz for a 2 count.

-Miz tries for SCF by Rey sends him to the outside. Riley is now back in trying to get Miz back in the ring.

-ADR is sent into Riley who was on the ropes taking him out.

-619 by Rey and a top rope splash on ADR but ADR is in the ropes.

-Miz comes from behind and rolls up Rey for the win.

Winner: The Miz

Riley and Miz slowly walk back up the ramp while Rey looks on frustrated.

While Riley and Miz celebrate Cena comes out and congratulates Miz like he did after WrestleMania. Cena says the match at the ppv will be an I Quit match. Miz doesn’t look happy about this nonsense.

Truth then comes out of nowhere and hits the mic check on Rey in the ring as we go off the air.

Ok RAW I guess. They set up matches for the ppv but right now they are just “eh” matches.

05-02-11 WWE RAW REVIEW

May 2, 2011

I think we’re in store for a packed show… here we go!

Show starts off with a video on Sept 11th 2001 with still pictures of the World Trade Center and former President Bush’s state of the union shortly after the attack. Video is shown from Sept 13th 2001 when Smackdown came on as the first sporting event since the attack.

They cut to the arena where Lilian Garcia is in the ring to sing America the Beautiful. Nice touch to bring her back for this, she rocks it! Strong USA chant breaks out after she’s done before we cut to the RAW show opener.

The Rock’s music then hits as he walks out to the stage to the crowd losing their shit again as he looks on. Rock’s got a new hand gesture that Miami picks up quick. He holds his palms out with his thumbs extended and touching. Rock finally tries to get on the mic but he drowned by “Rocky” chants and cheers. He then delivers “…Finally”, the crowd finishes it but he stays “home” which gets the crowd chanting for him again. He says “we got him” which makes the crowd lose it and chant USA! He then thanks the armed forces and how proud he is of them. He leads everyone in the Plead of Allegiance, hey the Plead got a good pop too. He then goes off about being porn in Miami and how the doctor said he was definitely called Johnson. How he had a mustache and afro in high school looking like the lead singer in Menudo. Haha They cut to the picture on the tron! Haha He said that face right there ate more pie than King Kong Bundy. He brings up college which and bringing the championship to Miami. He brings up the WWE quickly and is about to go into “if you smell…” when we get an email. Shit grinning Michael Cole stands up and starts to read the email but the Rock stops him. Rock tells Cole to have some class and read the email to his face. Cole tries to deflect but Rock cuts him off and brings up Cole’s wins recently and how he thinks he’s a tough guy. He eggs Cole on by calling him a drunk hobbit jack bag bitch. Cole said he isn’t the same guy Rock use to pick on and he associates with winners. Cole then takes off his jacket, shirt to reveal a Celtics jersey which gets booed hard. Sir Michael then goes on to egg Miami because he accepts and heads into the ring. Cole says the GM demands an apology for embarrassing the GM and will shut down Rock’s party if he doesn’t. Cole then says he wants an apology for the shit Rock’s done to him over the years. Rock says Cole is right and he did disrespect the GM and Cole over the years and has one thing to say to him… I’m sorry. He then extends his hand and Cole is reluctant but Rock says he is sorry and to accept it like a man. Cole shakes his hand and says thank you for apologizing. Rock smiles as he says some shit that gets beeped and hits the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow on Cole to end the segment…. Or not… Rock gets back on the mic and intro’s Pitbull, yeah the hip hop dude. I’m Cuban but I don’t know much about this dude. He wishes the Rock a happy birthday then goes into some song. Crowd seems to dig it. Now we get the Heat cheer leaders out to dance behind him….

ok we’re going on 30mins without a match folks. I’m sure Miami is digging this but lets wrap it up.

Rock gets video birthday wishes from Labron James and Dwyane Wade.

We get JR out to join Lawler and Mathews!

John Morrison vs. R-Truth

-while Morrison is coming down Truth jumps him from behind beating his ass and hitting that jumping reverse neck breaker on the outside.

-refs head out to send Truth to the back.

-Morrison is then helped up the ramp.

-Truth then comes back out and hits the same move but on the steel stage.

-refs keep Truth at bay while the others check on him.

Winner: no match

Another video birthday wish, this one from Jimmy Kimmel.

Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

-bulldog by Kelly after a slap from Maryse.

-seconds later Kharma’s music hits for a nice pop from the crowd. She slowly comes down to the ring while Kelly is crapping herself.

-Maryse is still selling the crappy bulldog. Haha

-Kharma looks at both of them but turns her attention to Maryse and hits her ass with the implant buster.

-Kharma then looks over at Kelly who is cowarding in the corner.

-Kharma then… leaves…!?

Winner: No Contest.

Ok fuckers that’s two matches that didn’t happen. Let’s get on it already.

Miz is in the back sitting in the locker room when Riley shows up and Miz is pissed Riley didn’t show up last night to help him. Riley brings up the draft but says who cares about a draft (no shit) and brings up Riley’s personal contract with Miz which he says takes precedence over anything. Miz wants Riley in his corner tonight when he wins his title back.

Video birthday wish for the Rock by Paul Walker. He says stupid shit and waves his hand like Cena the whole time.

Oh shit after the break we get another video, this one by Samual L. Jackson! He doesn’t say “motherfucker” at all. Bullshit.

Rock in the back talking to the diva’s about singing happy birthday to the First Lady. Rock walks over to people like Teddy Long, Kozlov and Santino who’s dressed as Rock in the Fast 5 movie. Hornswoggle shows up dressed as the scorpion king… Christ then we get Khali dressed as the tooth fairy… dude this is grounds for quitting right here. Rock turns to his right and its Ron Simmons! Rock points at all these fools and we get… DAMN! Haha oh hey look Zack Ryder was invited to the party. Did he get traded off WWE Superstars yet?

Birthday video from Steve Carrell. Funny shit.

WWE Champion John Cena vs. The Miz w/Alex Riley

-its funny the Miz actually looks odd without the title… hm, who woulda known!

-Cena gets a typical reaction. I hate this title belt and I hate it even more with this dude holding it again. So unnecessary.

-I think Cena almost fell over during his pre match intro.

-Cena sucks chants off the bat, followed by bitches chanting Lets Go Cena and the dudes with Cena Sucks.

-sloppy dropkick and bulldog by Cena for 2 counts.

-Cena knocks Riley off the ropes but walks into a Miz clothesline.

-Cena sent to the outside for a Riley clothesline behind the refs back.

-Miz sends Cena into the steel steps.

-Miz rolls him into the ring for a 2 count.

-clothesline in the corner by Miz.

-Miz to the top with a double axe handle for a 2 count.

-back from break and Miz hits a neckbreaker for another 2.

-Miz goes for another corner clothesline but Cena moves and goes into his crappy move set that leads into the YCSM fist drop.

-Cena goes for the AA but Miz rolls out and stiff kicks Cena in the head.

-Cena gets on the STF but Miz gets to the ropes quick.

-low DDT by Miz for a 2 and a half.

-Miz goes to the corner and takes the padding off of it while Riley distracts the ref.

-Miz tries to send him into the corner but he fights out only to get hit by the backbreaker/neckbreaker combo for another 2 1/2. Crowd was shocked by that one.

-Miz goes for the SCF but Cena fights out and we get a ref bump.

-Cena gets on the STF but there is no ref.

-Riley goes to hit Cena with the briefcase but Cena gets Riley up in the AA.

-Miz hits Cena in the stomach with the briefcase and hits the SCF for another near fall.

-Miz is pissed but then goes serious face only to walk into an AA.. fuck..1..2..KICKOUT!!!

-Miz hits Cena with the title while Riley distracts!…1…2..THREEE!!!!!

Winner: The Miz is the NEW WWE Champion

Ref sees the belt in the ring and restarts the match… god dammit! The ref then changes the decision….

Winner: John Cena

Riley and Miz argue but Cena makes the superman comeback and hits them with clotheslines and an AA to Riley. Lame.

And yes another video for the Rock, this one is from Ellen… blah blah blah.

Oh god video from Tyler Perry…

They go to footage from last night where Cena tells the live crowd at the ppv the news about Osama. Only time this dude doesn’t get booed.

Rey Mysterio & US Champion Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger & Drew McIntyre

-Del Rio comes to the ring in a car but heads for commentary.

-waist lock take down by Swagger on Rey.

-Rey corner but he fights back with a boot to the head. Rey tags in Kofi.

-Swagger takes down Kofi but we go to break.

-back from break and Kofi is still cornered by Drew and Swagger.

-ADR is pissed he isn’t the only Mexican on RAW. Looks like they are going back to that feud…

-frequent tags by Drew and Swagger.

-Kofi makes the hot tag and we get a tilt a whirl from Rey on Drew followed but kicks to the head for the pin attempt. Swagger saves.

-Trouble in Paradise to Drew then the 619!

-ADR is on his feet while Rey is climbing to the top.

-Splash by Rey for the win and the baseball slide drop kick to ADR who was trying to get into the ring.

Winners: Rey Mysterio & Kofi Kingston

Video for the Rock by Ludacris. I’m getting over these videos…

Dan Marino video for the Rock. Dude still looks young n shit.

World Champion Christian in the back with The Rock chit chatting. Vicki Guerrero walks in with Ziggler who got Rock a big ol’ cake… from behind its… Mae Young. Vicki and Ziggler laugh like they got the Rock but Rock says Vicki can lose all the weight she wants but she will never be as dope as Mae. Rock thanks Mae for coming then gives her a big ol kiss on the lips, then talks shit to Ziggler. Cena shows up and we get boos. He said he’s got a gift the WWE Championship and he said he’s going to hold it till WrestleMania next year for their match to make it even bigger. Rock says just bring it, then Cena’s ass walks off while Rock stares him down.

George Lopez video…

Mason Ryan w/CM Punk vs. Tag Team Champion Kane

-Ryan overpowers Kane and sends him to the outside with a collar and elbow tie up.\

-clothesline takes Kane down followed by a body slam.

-Kane fights back with an uppercut and a clothesline until Punk comes in for the DQ.

Winner: Kane by DQ

Nexus comes in but Kane fights out. Kane goes to chokeslam Ryan but Ryan pulls his hand off and hits a sit down uranage. Nexus jump Kane until Big Show comes out. He fights off Nexus until he gets speared by Ryan! Ryan then looks back at everyone and leave on his own while Punk looks on confused.

Video for the Rock by Regis and Kelly.

Craig Ferguson video for the Rock.

The Rock comes out to end the show, he asks if everyone had fun. They approve. He thanks them all for tonight. He shills his family and the WWE. He then says that next years WrestleMania is going to be the biggest…. Oh shit Mr. McMahon returns!!! Vince wishes him a happy birthday. He brings up Rock asking for the opportunity which Vince says he’s made good one. Vince shills the Rock and keeps thanking him and then just thanks him for just being The Rock. Vince says they’ve put together a gift for Rock and says thank you for coming home.

We cut to a video on The Rock’s career to Piddy’s song Coming Home. If this dude doesn’t win the Title in Miami from Cena that place is going to riot!

Rock is in the ring and he’s trying not to get emotional while the Rock chants for him. Now they go to Mya on the stage to sing Rock happy birthday… shows going long… Rock thanks everyone before we get “if you smell…” and now we get streamers.

Fuck man they should have had a night like this for Edge, that motherfucker had to retire. Shit.

They make the Rock seem like SUPER big deal in his home town on his birthday. They are going to have to come hard to build towards WrestleMania seeing how long they have from here until then.