03-16-15 WWE RAW

by

new-raw

 

Leading into the most lackluster WrestleMania in years, let’s see what this RAW has in store…

-Rollins, Big Show, J&J and Kane started off the show… they are sour over what happened last week with Randy Orton. Big Show apologized to Rollins for falling for Orton’s shenanigans and falling for it. Kane apologized as well but took a dig at Show while doing so. Noble does the same while Mercury was too emotional to talk. Haha, that was funny. Rollins then accepted Orton’s challenge for WrestleMania as long as Orton agrees to face him tonight on RAW… ass backwards booking? This brings Orton out to shit talk and accept this match tonight.

 

-AJ Lee with Paige took on Nikki Bella with Brie. The Bella’s do a split screen promo on the troubles between AJ and Paige… I guess we’re supposed to forget the Nikki/Brie feud… They got some time, not a good thing when a Bella is involved. In classic RAW form, there was a distraction on the outside which set up for Nikki getting the win on AJ… sigh. Fucking hate this finish.

 

-Kane and Big Show has an interview in the back with Renee Young. They argue in front of her before Rollins comes in to calm these fuckers down. Renee is all but forgotten… lame. Kane scolds Rollins before he and Show agree NOT to be at ringside tonight for Rollins’ match… I don’t care.

 

-Ryback took on The Miz with MIZdow in his corner. Ryback held Miz so Sandow could hit him… Miz fought out and commanded Sandow to put it down which he did. It didn’t matter, Ryback still made short work of Miz while Sandow watched on and smiled. After the match Sandow tried to help Miz up only to eat a skull crushing finale…

 

-recap of John Cena bullying his way into a title match at WrestleMania before we go to the contract signing. The set up in the ring is fucking goofy as fuck as half of the ring sports the Russian flag while the other the American flag… even the table has this shit going on. Fuckin Cena calls this contract the most important he’s ever signed… fuck. He cuts one of his “spirited” promos about the US Title. Rusev came out for this with a representative that looked like a miniature shaven Sheamus… Lana isn’t here but gets a “we want Lana”. Mini Sheamus says the Mania match isn’t going to happen because it wasn’t Rusev himself who called for the match, it was Lana. This dudes “accent” is so bad Booker T had to point it out. So to get this match to happen Cena had to agree to let Rusev read a statement… he does. He shit’s on Americans and Cena gets all huffy about it. The contract is signed but Rusev gets the last laugh turning over the table before the Russian flag came down from the rafters.

 

-hey guys, Sheamus is returning!… said, no one ever…

 

-New Day took on the WWE Tag Champions Cesaro and Tyson Kidd with Natalya. This shit was a short mess. Cesaro ended up getting the pin on New Day. Matadores beat on New Day after the match…

 

-more yapping from Rollins in the back, now with J&J… Noble gets slapped and quits… Mercury just shrugs and walks off.

 

-Brock Lesnar has a pre-tape interview… I think some of this promo has been recycled. He does bring up his contract and says either way (staying or going) he’s still WWE Champion. He basically don’t give a fuck.

 

-Big Show took on Erick Rowan… ok, fuck this I’m going to be and finish this later… its now Wednesday so its MUCH later and its been hard to avoid what happened on Monday but I’ll still cover that shit… oh Big Show beat the shit out of Rowan.

 

-Larry Zbyszko was the next inductee to the WWE Hall of Fame.

 

-Most of the dudes in the Andre the Giant Battle Royal are in the ring… this is a who’s who of the lower mid card… Then Mark Henry showed up. This then breaks out into a mock battle royal which Mark Henry “won”.

 

-Paul Heyman was up next to cut another on point promo on Brock, WrestleMania and Roman Reigns. Listen to that shit. Roman Reigns interupted this promo sporting a new shirt that said “I can, I will”… dudes at least getting better promo material.

 

-We get a recap of everyone quitting Seth Rollins.

 

-Renee Young stops Paul Heyman in the back to ask him what just happened out there with Roman Reigns. There is a chemistry between Heyman and Young that you just can’t fake. Brock will be on RAW next week.

 

-Luke Harper, Bad News Barrett & Stardust took on Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler & Dean Ambrose… with R-Truth who came down to watch this match at ringside… he’s got the IC Title clipped to his back… unfortunately he ended up on commentary. As distracting as Truth can be on commentary, this was a pretty good match that got a lot of time. Dean Ambrose would finally get the pinfall on Barrett with the dirty deeds. The IC Title hot potato-ed a couple of times after the match with Barrett getting his title back after hitting pretty much everyone with a bull hammer.

 

-Steph and Hunter are looking at her phone in the back when Rollins comes in to cry about everyone quitting him. He’s not keeping friend with Steph and Hunter either…

 

-another Bray Wyatt promo…

 

-Main event time with Randy Orton coming out first. Rollins was then out, he cuts a promo that no one has quit him and it was all a rouse… oh good burn Seth… sigh… Orton grabs a chair as the entire Authority comes down to ringside. A “we want Sting” chant broke out while Orton was surrounded… the lights then go out… when they come back up Sting is standing next to Orton and both of them take out the Authority! Crowd ate this up and chanted “Sting” loudly. Good shit.

 

-It was tough for me to get through this show but the final segment was worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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