03-03-14 WWE RAW




Live from Chicago… Will we get CM Punk? Stay tuned!

-CM Punk music hits and this place goes ape shit! This crowd is chanting their ass off but he doesn’t come out… its Paul Heyman who holds the mic out so it picks up theses massive chant. he then says he deserves louder. He definitely gets it. Paul then sits in the middle of the ring, legs crossed to tell the story of a “Paul Heyman guy” who was never wanted in the WWE. Heyman then goes on to say that this is his “pipe bomb” and that Punk isn’t here. He says there is someone to blame about Punk isn’t around and why no one is talking about it… he then blamed the fans for Punk not being here. He then goes on about how when Punk was with him, things in his career were different. Crowd is shitting on Paul’s comments. Paul then blames the Undertaker as this downward spiral started at last years WrestleMania so now he wants revenge for all of this… boy, this is a stretch… He then brings out Brock who gets loud Punk chants. They then show the footage from last week and the contract signing. Brock then talks about how he thinks Taker is scared of him and names off what he calls failures at trying to break this streak… Heyman and Lesnar go to leave when Mark Henry’s music hits! Brock attacks first but takes a shot by Henry! Its not long before Brock sends Henry to the steel steps. He then used those steps on the head of Henry. Mark Henry then takes an F5 through the announce table!!! This still got “CM Punk” chants.


WWE Tag Team Champions New Age Outlaws vs. Uso’s

-Road Dogg FINALLY plays a heel and tells Chicago they aren’t getting his catch phrases tonight… The Uso’s are getting love here so at least this crowd isn’t going to completely shit on this show. The Outlaws keep the advantage to start off the match. Hot tag is made which saw Jimmy take both of the Outlaws down and out which got a close pin attempt. Jay then got the tag while his brother dives to the outside. He then hits the super kick and the splash off the top from the pin, the win and the tag titles! Chicago loved that!

Winners: Uso’s


-we get “treated” to footage of “Need for Speed” with tonight’s host, Aaron Paul. The diva’s are in the back shilling this footage… so stupid. please don’t watch this.


Intercontinental Champion Big E vs. Cesaro w/Zeb Colter & Jack Swagger

-very past paced match with Cesaro showing off feats of strength which lead into the big swing. Swagger then comes in to hit the Swagger bomb on Big E for the DQ… Cesaro and Zeb looks on pissed. Big E then takes the big ending which Chicago didn’t like.

Winner: Bi E by DQ


The Shield vs. Wyatt Family

-The Shield might as well have been CM Punk because this crowd made them feel like they were! FUCK! “This is awesome” chant even before the match started. Seth Rollins is working his ASS off tonight to show he ain’t to be forgotten in the Shield! Reigns and Ambrose argued at ringside which cost Rollins who was trying to make a tag. Ambrose finally gets a tag who then works over Rowan which leads to a figure four and a lot of WOOOS. Harper broke this up which lead to Ambrose getting cornered. Ambrose then goes for a tag but Rollins gets off the apron and walks off….!? He argues with Reigns who he tells to figure it out. Reigns then comes into the ring to take out his frustrations on the Wyatt’s. Reigns and Ambrose then brawl with the Wyatt’s which the ref lets happen. This match gets crazy with all 5 of these guys brawling. Bray would eventually hit the sister Abigail’s kiss on Ambrose while Rollins watches…

Winners:  Wyatt’s


-Renee in the back with Batista who calls the YES moments stupid and doesn’t believe how someone like Bryan is in the WWE.


-WWE Main Event is live tomorrow night and the Uso’s are taking on the Outlaws.


Fandango & Summer Rae vs. Santino & Emma

-Santino & Emma keep exchanging tags until Fandango gets tired of it and jumped Santino. This match got “CM Punk” and “we want Taker” chants. This finally ends with the Emma lock for the tap out.

Winner: Emma & Santino


Sheamus vs. Christian

-this was an all out brawl the entire time. These guy were trying to keep the crowd engaged and it worked for parts of the match. Sheamus got the brogue kick on the apron for the pin and the win. Good match. After the break Renee had  Sheamus for an interview when he gets jumped by Christian who beats on Sheamus until the refs break it up.

Winner: Sheamus


The Bella’s vs. Alicia Fox & Aksana

-I was as distracted as this crowd was by this match.

Winner: Bella’s


-Bryan is out and this crowd was insane for Bryan, he might as well been from Chicago! Before the match Bryan says he and Chicago are going to hijack RAW… He says he isn’t going to leave the ring until one of two things happens… this got a massive “CM Punk” chant! Either Batista comes out or Triple H comes out to accept his challenge for WrestleMania… not what this crowd wanted really… This brought the new McMahon’s who lavish in the Punk chants. This crowd boos the fuck out of Steph to the point you can barely hear what she says. Bryan goes on to tell these two that although everything they’ve tried to do he’s still here and challenges Hunter again. This crowd gives Hunter the same treatment. He shits on the current era before saying its going to take more than a B+ player for him to lace up his boots. Steph then goes onto a long story which finishes with her claiming the McMahon’s made him. Hunter explains again why this isn’t happening and tells Bryan to get out of his ring. Bryan isn’t going anywhere which lead to Steph calling Kane out who then gets jumped at ringside. Steph then calls out security to come get Bryan, massive Punk chants. Massive Daniel Bryan chants break out while they go to break… would have been a perfect time for Punk to come from behind and GTS Hunter… oh well.


-Del Rio is in the ring when a Shelby Mustang comes out to the arena. All of a sudden Ziggler’s music hits and the crowd loses it.


Dolph Ziggler w/Aaron Paul vs. Alberto Del Rio

-this is not only the best use of Paul but the best way not to get this kid booed out of the ring. Mid match Aaron Paul ends up standing on the announce table for the distraction, the zig zag and the pin. Quick one.

Winner: Ziggler


-the next Class of 2014 inductee is…. PAUL BEARER!


Intercontinental Champion Big E vs. Jack Swagger w/Cesaro & Colter

-this match doesn’t happen when Cesaro runs in and gives Big E the neutralizer. These two argue before Swagger pushes Cesaro. Cesaro is about to do the big swing on Swagger when Colter tries to stop Cesaro from doing this… He listens to Colter and tells him to help his brother Swagger up, he does. Colter asks for them to hug it out… they do but its not genuine. We get a “we the people” and we have averted another team from breaking up for now.

Winner: Big E by DQ


-John Cena stumbles his ass to the ring. He got “CM Punk” chants instantly. He said he can’t wrestle tonight, which got a YES chant. Cena tries to chill this crowd about his history in this town. The Wyatt’s then interrupt on the titantron. Bray compares Cena to a championship horse who starts to slow down. Bray claims he’s going to put Cena down.


-Batista does the backstage walk when Orton stops him to wish him luck…


-after the break we get Lana who intros Alexander Rusev. He has his own Olympic podium.


-it took 2 hours and 58 minutes for anyone to mention Hulk Hogan coming back last week and his appearance at the Today Show. Hogan’s got an announcement about WrestleMania next week…


Daniel Bryan vs. Batista

-Randy Orton came out before the match to watch this one at ringside. Off the top we got a “BOOtista” chant. Bryan would then go to work over the leg of Batista. During Bryan’s come back Hunter, Steph and Kane came back out which got Punk chants… Batista then sent Bryan into Orton which got an “overrated” chant. Orton then comes out and attacks Bryan for the DQ. He tries to after Batista but that gets him thrown into a running knee by Bryan. This breaks down which sets up Hunter getting kicked and Bryan taking a Batista bomb… Hunter gets pissed and pedigrees Bryan. After this Kane, Steph and Hunter stand over Bryan to loud CM Punk chants…

Winner: Bryan by DQ


-well… I guess that answers our questions… we’re not getting Punk back any time soon and definitely not for WrestleMania…




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