01-07-13 WWE RAW

by

new-raw

Punk vs. Rock is in full swing, BOOM!

-big to-do video package on the Rock being here tonight and CM Punk’s TLC match tonight against Ryback. God I hope this show is good tonight…

 

-and the show starts of with The Rock John Cena coming to the ring… fuck.

-We get a recap of the “shit” from last week.

-this fool recaps what’s going on tonight bringing up Punk, Ryback and The Rock.

-Ziggler and his crew of AJ and Big E Langston come out to interrupt…

-Ziggler and AJ have words for Cena including small dick references for Cena… stupid.

-Cena is in typical stupid ass style, starting a wave in the crowd and making Andrew “Dice” Clay jokes… sigh.

-Ziggler’s in the Rumble now.

-Cena was tiresome in 2012… this is ridiculous.

-Big E.’s on the mic… he tells Cena his match is on… with Ziggler!?

 

Dolph Ziggler w/AJ & Big E. Langston vs. John Cena

-Match was decent but mostly because of Ziggler. Big E. and AJ get involved enough to get booted from ringside mid match. Towards the end, they go into near falls basically having Cena kick out of everything Ziggler hit on him even after Big E comes back down to interfere… Cena one-moves it for the win, Christ.

Winner: Cena

 

Diva’s Champion Eve  vs. Kaitlyn

-this match was built around the ref telling Kaitlyn to tie her shoe only to have Eve take advantage of this. Eve ends up bouncing for the count-out. whatever.

Winner: Kaitlyn via countout.

 

-20th Year of RAW is next week. Fuck why am I still watching this shit 20+ years later!?

 

-Santino and Ricky Steamboat chit chat in the back when Wade Barrett walks up to shit on this parade and Steamboat…

 

-Orton in the back with Striker, he gets a good reaction from the crowd. 3MB walk in to announce they are in the Rumble. Orton gets to choose which dude he wrestles tonight, he picks Slater. Match of the year 2013?…

 

WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No vs. Rhodes Scholars

-Good tag match here although Kane pulled a Sin Cara on the top rope almost falling off. Cody and Sandow pull some old school wrestling here working over Bryan’s injured leg behind the refs back. That led to Bryan taking the crossroads.

Winners: Rhodes Scholars

 

Heath Slather w/3MB vs. Randy Orton

-typical Randy Orton match with the usual spots. Crowd really was behind this dude… but he wants to go heel. After the match 3MB get laid out with RKO’s.

Winner: Orton

 

Santino w/Ricky Steamboat vs. Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett

-short match. off the bat Santino tries to do Steamboat’s arm drags only to have Wade side step him. after the match Barrett and Steamboat tease going at it.

Winner: Barrett

 

-Striker with Sheamus when a hurt 3MB walk up on them… they get called out again!? The fuck?

 

Unites States Champion Antonio Cesaro vs. Great Khali w/Natalya & Hornswoggle

-Cesaro is now coming down to the ring waving an American flag, ha! Miz was on commentary which was annoying. Cesaro’s springboard spinning elbow off the ropes was DOPE! They are definitely putting over the Neutralizer as something big!

Winner: Cesaro

 

-Paul Heyman’s on the phone when stupid Brad Maddox interrupts. Maddox sucks, TNA style. Heyman doesn’t put up with his shit.

 

Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal w/3MB

-half way through and this is what we’re getting. Lets get to the Rock and Punk vs. Ryback. Anyhow, Sheamus pins Mahal after the brogue kick… this felt loooong.

Winner: Sheamus

 

TLC Match for the WWE Title – CM Punk vs. Ryback

-This match started at the 2 hour mark. Before the match Punk walks under a ladder, oh snap. Holy shit, CM Punk takes a stiff suplex on a ladder. Good spot with Ryback letting the crowd pick between that ladder or a steel chair. A lot of stiff shots with objects in this one. UGLY press slam from Ryback to Punk onto a ladder, fuck! Punk gets thrown out the ring and onto a table at ringside was a good spot. Ryback climbs for the title and is about to get his hands on the title when the lights go out (ECW style). Lights back on and the Shield is beating on Ryback while trying to keep him from climbing the ladder. Ryback takes a super powerbomb into a ladder that was set up on the steel steps.  Punk pulls himself up the ladder on takes the title ends this one. Good shit here, not great but definitely good.

Winner: Punk

 

-in the back after the match CM Punk and Heyman are questioned by Striker. Punk right off the bat denies being in cahoots with the Shield or Maddox. He’s coming back out later to drop pipe bombs apparently.

 

-also in the back Kane and Bryan argue about what happened earlier with Bryan’s knee. Vicki is in and says Bryan and Kane have an evaluation with Mr. Shelby next week. They go back and forth with dueling words…

 

-so over this night already…

 

World Champion Big Show vs. Kofi Kingston

-this match ends in minutes after a right hook from Big Show. This one was fast!!

Winner: Big Show

 

-CM Punk is back out with Heyman.

-Punk tells us a personal story about his current history since the “pipe bomb”.

-he claims to have make this “persona” he’s been playing…

-he talks about a glass ceiling in the WWE.

-Punk shits on Cena and Little Jimmy while putting over Bryan, Clay and Kidd.

-Punk then shits on Bruno and Hogan for their one night a month title match.

-He shits on the crowd and how they are suckers for key words like the city they are in. they play into it.

-Punk says he has never done all of what he’s done for the fans but for himself.

-a stage hand tells Punk they need to go to break… we go to break.

-after the break he’s still going off, I’m getting bored now.

 

-The Rock’s music FINALLY plays and he comes out to a crazy ovation!

-Let’s hope we get The Rock tonight and not Dwayne…

-Rock calls Punk delusional after listening to everything he had to say.

-Rock says Punk has 20 days before their match.

-it’s the Rock who showed up tonight!

-Rocky chants.

-He references Cookie Puss and Carvel when talking about how Punk couldn’t get ice cream bars made. Haha

-Rock starts a cookie puss chant out of nowhere! Haha

-Punk calls the fans puppets.

-Rock is on point tonight.

-Rock says he’s back to entertain, to beat Punk and after 10 years win the Title.

-Rock is trying to make this fool laugh and Punk is holding his serious face as strong as he can. Haha

-Punk is told that the he doesn’t matter the fans matter.

-Rock then pulls off a “it doesn’t matter if you matter!” haha!

-both circle before Punk lays the title in front of Rock and says he doesn’t care how many days he’s back that he’s going to kick Rock’s ass.

-Punk is on point here too, good shit.

-oh shit, Punk just tells Rock his arms are too short to box with god… !!!

-Rock finishes this off with a rock bottom to Punk that sends him to the outside.

-Rock picks up the WWE Title before throwing it out to Punk.

 

-Well I thought that was some really good shit! Oh I am pumped for this match, this HAS to be better than Cena vs. Punk from Mania! Hehe!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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