10-04-11 IMPACT WRESTLING

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#HepatitisZombie

-It’s always interesting to see what I come back to when I haven’t watched this shit for 2 weeks…

 

-recap shows more shit going on between James Storm and Robert Roode… so much so that Hogan has “brought in” King Mo to ref the match between these two… eh.

-Aries is buckling to the pressure of facing Hardy at Bound for Glory.

-Sting and Hogan end up at the A&8’s club house and get beat up and forced into a match at the ppv…

 

-in the back Hogan and Sting open up the show, cold.

-apparent Sting has to pick his tag team partner for the ppv tonight… I thought it was obvious enough it was going to be Hogan, apparently not.

 

-so Samoa Joe is the new TV Champion!? Interesting.

 

-oh no, here comes Anderson…

-he gets on his mic and tells Hogan and Sting to watch his next match… ugh.

-oh god, its even worse, he’s taking on Gunner!

Mr. Anderson vs. Gunner w/Kid Kash

-greasy hair jumps Anderson before the match but Ken makes a come back quick.

-good hip toss but BAD dropkick by Anderson.

-they go back and forth before Ken hits the mic check for the win.

Winner: Anderson

-after the match Kash jumps Anderson, he takes his own mic check.

-which nothing match.

 

-Tara in the back on the phone before Gail Kim walks up on her.

-Tara tries to make it sound like she’s got a “big Hollywood” boyfriend…

-She also brings up Gail’s husband from Restaurant Impossible. I like that show.

-isnt this basically what Madison did a while ago before it ended up being Earl Hebner? dumb.

 

Tara & Gail Kim vs. Knockout’s Champion Tessmacher & Knockout’s Tag Team Champion ODB – WWE’s Tiffany is the ref.

-ODB gets a chant while she beats on Gail.

-Tara takes a bronco buster, stinky.

hot tag to Tessmacher gets payback on Tara.

-Tara’s stocking are showing at the top… no to sexy.

-blah blah blah, widows peak to Tessmacher for the pin.

Winner: Tara & Kim

-Tara pushed Kim into Tessmacher to help her get the pin.

 

-Bruce Pritchard and Al Snow talking about some shit that doesn’t make sense to me in the back.

-after the break they recap Joey Ryan’s silliness with Al Snow.

-this isn’t clicking with me, mostly Ryan… I don’t know what it is but this kids always been missing something with me. I think he’s trying too hard to force this character.

-Snow comes down to the ring.

-Gut Checks are not happening on house shows apparently.

-Snow intros Joey Ryan…

-a somber Snow brings up laying his hands on Ryan and apologizes.

-Ryan pokes him into saying I’m sorry.

-Ryan gloats about some other news that he makes Snow announce, he’s holding a TNA contract for Ryan…

-Snow tried to get Ryan to read it but he just wants to go ahead and blindy sign this…

-he signs it on Snow’s back…

-Snow brings up reading the contract, its apparently only for one night at the ppv… against Al Snow…

-wah wahhhhh.

 

-Sting and Kurt Angle talking about A&8’s when Daniels and Kazarian poke their heads in all noisy like. Funny.

-Sting wants someone not wrestling on the ppv already…

-Bully Ray shows up and eye fucks Angle before he leaves.

-Stone Cold Bully Ray knows he should be in the World Title match at the ppv but A&8’s fucked that up.

-he wants to be Stings partner.

-Sting wants to see a bully tonight for proof he can do the job…

 

Television Champion Samoa Joe vs. RVD

-Joe apparently had to plead to Hogan into getting into a championship match last week!? They could have just had a 4 man tournament.

-Joe keeps RVD grounded.

-shortly after RVD is put in the STF.

-RVD fights back and gets a springboard kick to Joe into the rolling thunder. RVD needed to change is style YEARS ago…

-RVD goes for the 5 star, instead takes the muscle buster.

Winner: Joe

-kind of a squash.

 

 

-AJ in the back with Hernadez and Chavo.

-Chavo accuses AJ for interfering in his match last week.

-the tag champions come in and Hernandez gets called nacho libre… ouch.

-the champions stir up trouble here.

 

-Dixie recalls Bound for Glory moments like Sting ball hogging the title.

-their tag line for the ppv is “memories are waiting”… keep waiting.

 

-in the back Aries and Hardy try to make nice.

-Bully Ray walks on both of them.

-he’s punching one of these dudes tonight to prove to Sting he should get the match at the ppv.

-again, Hardy doesn’t say much except likes have a three way… awkward.

 

Chavo Guerrero w/Hernandez vs. Kurt Angle w/AJ Styles.

-uncle Hector is on Spanish commentary.

-Chavo keeps Angle down with the head lock even though Kurt tries to get out with a suplex.

-Taz and Tenay bring up Kurt winning the gold medal with a broken neck. This information is so tired… yes we know what he DID…

-typical match for both.

-Chavo gets the roll up on the distracted Angle for the pin.

Winner: Chavo

-wasn’t into the match really.

-after the match we get a tag team stand off while the tag champions watch on and try to get these teams to fight.

 

Douglas Williams vs. X Division Champion Zima Ion

-match ends fairly quick with Ion getting a reverse arm breaker.

Winner: Ion

-ref reverses the decision when Ion doesn’t break the hold.

Winner: Williams by DQ

-Ion gets on the mic after the match to tell Hogan and Sting he’s too pretty for that spot against the A&8’s. haha

 

-recap of King Mo on MMA Unsensored with Dixie pushing why he’s coming to TNA.

-they should have been playing these clips of King Mo for months before this…

 

-commerical for the LAST season of Jersey Shore… thank god this is finally going away… I never watched it but knowing it was actually on was painful.

 

-Bruce Pritchard is showing D-Lo Brown footage of a house show.

-its about Matt Morgan showing up and kicking a ref in the face.

-Pritchard is not happy about this and Brown swears it wont happen again.

 

-James Storm comes down to the ring with his horrible theme music.

-recap crap of his relationship with Roode.

-he’s out to prove he’s the better man…

-he brings up King Mo before Roode comes out.

-Roode yells a lot about the shenanigans with Mo.

-of course King Mo comes out… more bad music.

-this fool comes out looking like he just won King of the Ring…

-Roode gets pushed down when he gets in the face of this fool who showed up in his gear.

-Storm and Mo have some words before raising his hand and having beers.

 

-Hogan and Sting in the back again.

-Hogan wrote down who he wants in the match.

-Sting wants to watch Ray’s match before choosing tonight.

-another A&8’s recap of last week before cutting to Joseph Park bring tortured by this group.

-they stay stuff and things before looking like they are going to take a car battery to the nipples of Park. #naughty

 

Bully Ray vs. Jeff Hardy vs. TNA Champion Austin Aries

-we take a break before the match starts only to come back to mid way in the match.

-Hardy’s face makeup makes him look like a hepatitis zombie.

-twist of fate and swanton to Bully for the pin… that Aries breaks up.

-Hardy then breaks up Aries submission on Ray.

-lots of tension between Aries and Hardy.

-Ray wants his chain, instead takes the title belt while calling Christ Hemme a bitch… geez man.

-Ray sends Hardy into Aries (same shit Tara did earlier)

-Ray then hits the bubba bomb on Hardy for the pin.

Winner: Bully Ray

-match was fine, at least it kept me more interested than the others did.

-Ray walks off yelling to Sting while Aries is all pissed at Hardy.

-Aries is playing all jealous of Hardy’s reactions.

 

-Hogan and Sting head to the ring… this is your main event segment…!?

-Hogan is more wordy than they need to be here…

-lame story short, both agree that it should be Anderson… the fuck!? really…

-they call for Anderson to come out… he doesn’t.

-instead they cut to the back where the A&8’s just jumped Anderson…

-Bully comes into the ring all pissed about their choice.

-Ray pleads his case again to Sting and wants him to convince Hogan of the same.

-Sting then tells Hogan he wants Bully Ray.

-Ray wants to shake Hogan’s hand here to prove he can trust him.

-Hogan shakes his hand but the crowd isn’t trusting this.

-this was probably the best shit on the show. Now it would be awesome if Ray was the guy behind A&8’s because right now he makes the most sense.

 

-god damn THIS felt like a 3 hour show…

 

 

 

 

 

 

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