07-30-12 WWE RAW

by

 

Fire is now the biggest deal in the WWE…

-Cole tells us the crowd is still coming into the arena… they had a fire AND they got footage! Haha of course they do!

-they recap last weeks episode and all the shenanigans that went down. This is a long piece.

-the last shot is of CM Punk after his GTS on the Rock.

 

-WWE Champion CM Punk doesn’t waste time in coming out after that.

-I can’t make out the reaction for Punk here.

-beard has been cut down. More of a “Nexus CM Punk”.

-Punk says last week last weeks RAW moment was bigger than others WrestleMania moments.

-Punk brings up Lawler saying Punk turned his back on the WWE Universe. Punk eye fucks Lawler before heading over to the desk.

-Punk sits cross-legged on the desk asking Lawler why he would jump to conclusions.

-He says the Rock is ONE person, not the WWE Universe.

-He feels disrespected by Rock for interrupting him last week then how Rock brings up taking the WWE Title.

-Punk says Rock tried to make the RAW 1,000 episode his own.

-How he is the WWE Champion and how Rock has gone silent since.

 

-Big Show comes out during Lawler’s ear fuck.

-Show says last weeks episode finish was about him and how he cost Cena the WWE Title and thus become the first MITB loser.

-How HE knocked out Cena and Punk still couldn’t get the job down.

-Punk is still champion because of Big Show… ooo.

-Show vows to be the next WWE Champion.

 

-Assclown John Cena comes out… he and Show start fighting.

-Punk doesn’t look impressed that these fucks have interrupted his shit again.

-New RAW GM AJ is out… all dressed up. Noooo!!!!!!

-She makes Show vs. Cena for tonight with winner taking on Punk at Summerslam.

-She is officially bland-create-a-GM…

 

-Cole asks Lawler after the break… then they go to a Poll about Punk comments earlier…

 

-Daniel Bryan looks like he is going to walk into AJ’s office but changes his mind…

 

WWE US Champion Santino vs. Alberto Del Rio w/Ricardo Rodriguez

-did we do this match already!?

-no one cares about this pseudo-feud.

-Del Rio beats on Santino, its just a prolonged version of their last match.

-Santino dropkicks ADR to the outside before the break.

-we’re back and its back to a Del Rio ass kicking.

-Alberto counteracts the splits with a kick to the head of Santino. Haha

-Cobra is out but ADR cuts him off and sends Santino into the corner.

-Armbreaker the tap out.

Winner: Del Rio

 

-I guess we can get used to longer matches now with the 3 hour RAW. I’m not complaining that’s what I watch wrestling for, shit. After the match Del Rio says he just destroyed the United States Champion and how both Santino and Sheamus are beneath him.

-He’s only wrestling World Title matches from now on and nothing else.

-Well!

 

-Bryan outside AJ’s door again… get to it man!

 

-Clay’s entrance was mid way when we’re back from break…

-Vicki comes out to laugh at Clay and his girls dance moves.

-Vicki then goes into her dancing with her thumbs bit.

-Damien Sandow then comes out, he rolls the footage of what happened to him last week with DX.

-Sandow is pissed that Clay is laughing at the footage then jumps him!

-Sandow beats on him leaving Clay laying in the ring before him music hits.

-Clay must have pissed someone off.

-Sandow is on the raise!

-sooooo why involve Vicki….?!

 

-Recap of 2 weeks ago with Jericho and Ziggler.

-they show how Ziggler almost cashed in on Friday then changed his mind, only to get thrown into the ring by Jericho who was sporting Ziggler’s shirt.

 

-Bryan is finally in AJ’s office…

-She’s all smiles and tries to shake Bryan’s hand.

-She reminds him that she is his boss now.

-AJ brings up the white coat dudes from last week…

-She knows he was trying to commit her last week…

-Bryan is taking on Sheamus tonight… not for the World Title…

-AJ then starts to chant NO…

-I don’t like this version of AJ already.

 

-Recap of the useless segment between Triple H, Paul Heyman, Stephanie and Lesnar.

-Steph’s promo was dumb.

-this makes me see this match less.

-worst use of 5 million bucks…

 

-there is another poll… for the match stip of Bryan’s match tonight against Sheamus…

-Josh stops Sheamus in the back, he’s asked what kind of match he wants tonight… he says… I don’t know… ?

-He says the roofer the better.

-Sheamus goes to leave but then asks if Josh is ok, how he looks rough this week… this week just started. What the fuck was that??

 

-recap of the… fire. Better before the show than during.

 

Street Fight Match

Daniel Bryan vs. World Champion Sheamus

-YES chants are strong.

-Bryan is on NO duties after telling the people to stop chanting YES, because only he can chant it.

-the announcement of the match stip gets a YES chant.

-they’re trying to turn the YES chant against him… again.

-Sheamus has the advantage thus far.

-they fight up the stage with Bryan kicks and a running dropkick sends Sheamus off the stage.

-running knee from the stage onto Sheamus!!!!

-back from break both are back in the ring as Cole puts over “RAW Active”…

-fall away slam by Sheamus on the outside.

-Sheamus brings out a chair and a kendo stick. Bryan those them back to the outside.

-Bryan is the first to use the kendo stick… multiple times on Sheamus.

-Bryan sets up the chair in the corner.

-Sheamus takes over on kendo stick duties.

-dropkick to Sheamus in the corner and his head hits the steel chair… 2½ count!

-oh the outside Sheamus uses the chair on Bryan before pulling off the first set of the steel steps.

-its teased but Sheamus ends up taking a shoulder into the opposing corner.

-Bryan puts the sets in the ring before sending Sheamus into the ringside barricade.

-Sheamus and Bryan fight for the kendo stick.

-white noise on the steps is teased… instead Bryan he takes a brogue kick onto the steps for the pin.

Winner: Sheamus

 

-Good match with a few good spots on the stage.

 

-After the break Bryan is still in the ring complaining he’s hurt his neck… he keeps asking for a doctor…?

-Kofi and Truth come out for the next match during this…

-Truth’s in a suit…?!

-Kofi and Truth tell Bryan to bounce.

-Bryan introduces himself to Little Jimmy… then boots little Jimmy out of the ring!!! haha!

-Truth goes out to pick up little Jimmy.

-Bryan tells them to get out of there with their crazy asses.

-Bryan’s white suits come out for Truth…

-AJ then comes back out… in her business suit.

-She tells the white suits to go for Bryan…

-they escort him out of the ring.

-Bryan eye fucks AJ as she blows him kisses and waves him goodbye.

-Hating this thus far… oh shit Expendables 2 son!

 

-Friday night we get the Smackdown GM.

 

-Touts, both pro and con on CM Punk.

 

Kofi Kingston w/R-Truth & Little Jimmy vs. Titus O-Neil w/AW & Darren Young

-Jimmy talks a seat at ringside… what the fuck am I talking about…!?!?

-They should have gone with Young in this one, Titus ain’t good.

-fuck AW is back on the house mic… he makes a Kobe in Colorado joke… well that was timely and will probably get you apologizing in real life for saying it…

-Kofi chant while he tries to fight off Titus.

-Titus sucks.

-tornado DDT by Kofi into a Kofi come back into the BOOM drop.

-Truth takes out Young and AW throws his shoe at Kofi while saying “yo mama”…

-Titus with the sit down spin buster for the win.

Winner: Titus

 

-Dude is not good.

-Cole claims AW has “diamonds in the rough”….

 

-Punk in the back talking to Cena about last week.

-he tells Cena he would have done the same.

-Punk has no issue with Cena but he doesn’t wish him luck tonight… or Show.

-Punk says Cena needs to let it go that he did what Cena couldn’t in a year.

-Punk walks off while Cena looks retarded.

 

-Michael Cole is apologizing for the remarks made by AW earlier… told you.

 

-Heath Slater in the ring… more legends!?!?

-he says the legends have gone back to the retirement home and he’s going to get his career on track and challenges anyone on the current roster.

-he gets Randy Orton…

 

Heath Slater vs. Randy Orton

-loud reaction for the clean shaven Orton.

-2 strikes McGee poses for the fans as they cheer for him.

-Slater beats on Orton in the corner.

-Slater pins Orton!… kidding.

-Orton recovers and goes into HIS 5 moves of death.

-RKO and pin.

Winner: Orton

 

-Squash with a good reaction from the crowd. Can’t say shit about his 2 strikes though seeing as Rey has the same shit, huh?

 

-Bryan in the back and doesn’t want to answer questions from anyone… not even this doctor who is interviewing him… asking him YES questions. He chants YES uncontrollable in the face of this dude. He’s red faced.

 

-this is a looooong show and its starting to feel like it.

 

Chris Jericho & Christian vs. Intercontinental Champion The Miz & Dolph Ziggler w/Vicki

-light up jacket is still around.

-Miz is a Triple Crown winner now.

-Ziggler and Christian start it off before Miz is tagged in.

-frequent tags in this one. Its like musical chairs.

-chops in the corner by Jericho to Miz.

-Jericho sends both Ziggler and Miz to the outside setting up for the Christian dive.

-After the break, Miz and Ziggler have taken over.

-Ziggler and Christian would be a nice feud too.

-hot tag to Jericho is killed off by Miz who then jumps on Christian with Ziggler behind the refs back.

-handstand headlock to Christian by Ziggler.

-Ziggler misses the flying leg drop and Lawler calls him out on it.

-Ziggler tries it again and gets power bombed… probably the original spot.

-hot tags are finally made.

-liosault but Ziggler breaks up the count.

-spear by Christian!

-Walls by Miz is fought off.

-codebreaker to Miz after Christian gets in the thumb to the eye of Miz.

Winner: Jericho & Christian

-After the match Ziggler floors Jericho with the briefcase.

 

-Good tag team match right here!

 

-Fucking recap of the fire before the show AGAIN!

 

-Bryan gets more tests in the back with ink blots.

-the ink blots put together look like a goat… cleaver.

-Bryan blames Charlie Sheen for this.

-oh boy… this is happening isn’t it!?… fuck.

 

-more fan touts… Christ this is dumb. Who care what these people think… this coming from a 40 year old asshole blogging about this shit. Haha

 

Tyson Kidd vs. Tensai

-Kidd gets a real entrance… Tensai doesn’t.

-Kidd taken down shortly after the start.

-Albert chants continue.

-claim to the shoulder of Kidd.

-Kidd almost wins with another rollup.

-Kidd off the top with blockbuster for another 2.

-baldo bomb in to the back splash for the Tensai win.

Winner: Tensai

Tensai has lost a lot of steam. He beats on Kidd after the match. Ref reverses the decision via DQ… even though it was AFTER the match… the fuck?!

Winner: Kidd by DQ

-Sakamoto takes a beating after this…?

 

-Bryan gets his diagnosis… he’s strange BUT sane.

-Kane is Bryan’s anger management therapist… then beats his ass.

-get it… sigh…

 

-another recap of HHH vs. Brock.

 

-WWE Champion CM Punk is back out, he’s on commentary.

#1 Contender for SummerSlam

John Cena vs. The Big Show

-Punk is hoping Lawler isn’t upset about earlier… he isn’t.

-Show eye fucks Punk at ringside.

-the usual dueling chants.

-Punk says Cincinnati is on “fire” tonight… puns…

-they go over the list of people CM Punk is passing with his title reign.

-Punk doesn’t want people coming back to hog the spotlight when he’s champion.

-Punk and Lawler break up soon with Punk getting pissy with him.

-Oh yeah match… Cena has a sleeper on Show.

-Show finally powers out for the commercial break.

-I want to like The Campaign but thus far, yeah not feeling it.

-Lawler keeps pocking at Punk’s change of attitude…

-Cena tries to slam Show but it backfires and gets covered for a 2.

-bored by this match.

-chokeslam is turning into a DDT by Cena.

-Show makes another comeback with a side slam.

-Swagger bomb in the corner is missed by Show.

-Cena comeback into his YCSM fist thingy.

-Show with the chokeslam out of nowhere for a 2.

-something got beeped or some sort of technical issue…?

-Show and Cena to the floor.

-Cena gets launched into CM Punk at ringside!

-Cena beats the 10 count.

-Cena avoids the right hook and gets Show up…

-…when Punk comes in and beats on Big Show!

-Punk then gets a mic and tells us the winner is…….. no body.

-He calls both losers! Haha!

Winner: no contest

-Punk walks to the back and passed AJ on the way out.

-AJ makes it a triple threat match at SummerSlam…

-Punk comes out yelling at AJ and how she’s crazy and cant do this to him.

-She just smiles while Punk keeps yelling.

 

-Well I’m not sure what’s worse… another title shot for John Cena or a triple threat featuring John Cena….

 

-tonight felt looooong.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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