07-02-12 WWE RAW SUPERSHOW

by

No Brock but a good Heyman promo, the Truth returns and AJ’s on the come up.

 

 

Main event is Punk & Cena vs. Bryan & Jericho. God dammit how awesome is that Daniel Bryan is actually being seen as a main eventer finally!

 

RAW’s intro is doing that shit again where its about to start but then we go to commercial!? We’re back as they recap Big Show’s chokeslam and clutch to Cena last week. By the way you can’t make Show “unstoppable” when no one believes he can be in this day and age.

 

Cena starts the show… funny that most of the people shown clapping for this cock cobbler are pre-teen girls.

 

Why is the WWE Title MITB match only four dudes!? Roster depth perhaps?  😉 He yaps about the match, not paying attention to him at the moment but I’m sure its ground breaking yet hilariously funny…. Stupid.

 

Daniel Bryan finally comes down, no music just chanting YES! Bryan tells Cena he isn’t relevant, yeah well… Bryan claims he’s winning the title then beating Cena IF he wins the MITB briefcase.

 

Punk comes out to be more annoying than John Cena yelling YES!

 

He turns his attention to Cena but Jericho is now out to complain of getting HIS catchphrase stole by Punk.

 

Jericho then goes into ALL of his catchphrases including the classic hits like, “shut the HELL up”, “RAW is Jericho” and “EVVVVVVER be the same again”. Funny.

 

Kane is now out… Jericho puts over being scared that this is happening.

 

Big Show is now out… before he gets to the ring this breaks down all over the place.

 

In the end, it’s the Big Show standing tall.

 

Prime Time Players, Cody and Otunga take on Kofi, Santino, Christian and the returning R-Truth. Make had a good pace until the match break where we come back and AW is fucking mic’d for all to hear… this has killed the crowd and its quite annoying. Santino makes the hot tag before this breaks down and the Prime Time Players leave the ring. Cody leaves Otunga on his own over the MITB match shit from Friday.

 

Brodus Clay is now out…!? Throw this shit out the window. He gets involved setting up the Santino cobra shot to the face (what?) for the pin.

 

Christian hits Otunga with the killswitch before getting splashed by Clay.

 

The good guys dance with kids over the body of Otunga…

 

Christian should not be here dancing this shit up.

 

Speaking of Teddy Long’s dancing in the back before Alberto Del Rio and Rodriguez come into his office. He says he deserves a title shot and he gets it at the ppv but Teddy also lets him know he’s getting a surprise opponent tonight…?

 

RAW 1,000th moment… Mr. McMahon’s training videos for the Royal Rumble. Steph is taking about this moment. She’s looking tan.

 

Ricardo is out to intro Del Rio. The fans are chanting “culero” which means he takes it in the ass. Haha! Fucking Texans. He’s taking on Sin Cara… match doesn’t happen as Del Rio flips his shit and takes him out at ringside with the arm breaker.

 

Crazy ass AJ in the back when Bryan shows up with a flower he had just found.  She’s onto his ass and isn’t having it. This bitch bites the rose and spits it out.

 

The Bash version of Smackdown is tomorrow, don’t forget.

 

Paul Heyman is live… via satellite to talk about Brock Lesnar… he aren’t finding out tonight… we’ll be finding out on the 1,000th episode… Heyman says Brock is Triple H’s exit strategy so he can go on with his desk job. Dope promo by Heyman!

 

Oh great, Kane vs. Big Show in a No DQ match… tonight… I wonder if anyone keeps count on how many times these dudes has wrestled against each other.

 

Mixed tag match with Sheamus and AJ taking on Ziggler and Vicki… Vicki intros herself as “Queen Diva” before introducing Ziggler. Ziggler and Sheamus carry the match until Vicki is tagged in… AJ gives her a shining wizard and pins Vicki. She takes off chanting YES! She just pulled a big-shot on the World Champion.

 

They now follow AJ to the back where she runs into Punk. She’s all jealous cause he’s on the phone. He didn’t see the match so she’s pissed he isn’t paying attention to her…. wah wahhh.

 

Heath Slater is out for the next legend ass whoopin’. They recap the past legends who’ve run over Slater before cutting back to him in the ring talking about his one man band… Its Doink… fuck.

 

This Doink wears tennis shoes.

 

Slater actually beats Doink.

 

DDP’s music hits!

 

Diamond Dallas Page comes into the ring to give his bang before giving Slater the Diamond Cutter.

 

I guess no matches for DDP? I thought he had done the occasional match.

 

No Holds Barred video piece. Campy as fuck… the almost play it up like that too.

 

Did that military guy just calls John Cena “Jon Teena”???

 

Crap, Kane vs. Show is up… Soon enough it spills to the outside. Its just a brawl.

 

Big Show finally wins with a chokeslam onto a chair.

 

Teddy Long in the back and its… Eve. She tries to be nice. He gives her a “hello my name is” sign.

 

Teddy leaves and Eve runs into AJ. She claims AJ is just copying her.

 

AJ shits back on her and what Eve does to get attention and how she’ll show up how to get someone’s attention. AJ is DOPE.

 

Another RAW 1,000th moment… DX storming WCW with Del Rio recapping.

 

Tyson Kidd gets a RAW match!… nevermind, he’s taking on Tensai. OH SHIT KIDD WITH THE ROLLUP FOR THE PIN!

 

Tensai takes it out on Sakamoto again…. Sore. Loser.

 

Jericho and Bryan in the back. They banter about jackets and beards. Bryan goes into a YES chant which Jericho combats with “aaagain” over and over.

 

Punk and Cena chat about books, bitches and blunts. Punk wants Cena to follow his lead but Cena sarcastically agrees.

 

After the break Tensai gets his by beating on Kidd in the back. We just say this with Sakamoto…

 

Main event time… Jericho & Bryan vs. Cena & Punk.

 

I think Bryan is getting a “SI” chant… Yup!

 

Nice kicks in the corner by Bryan on Cena.

 

Typical bullshit chants for Cena.

 

Cena fucked up some sort of fisherman’s suplex attempt on Jericho.

 

Hot tags to Bryan and Punk. Nice exchange.

 

Anaconda vise is locked on but Jericho breaks it up.

 

Cena and Jericho fight up the stage and into the back for some cupcakes and wine.

 

Nice back and forth exchange here.

 

Bryan with the kick to the head of Punk for a 2½.

 

Superplex from the top by Punk for his own 2½.

 

AJ’s out! She skips around before getting on the ring apron.

 

Double cross body in the middle of the ring by Punk and Bryan.

 

AJ pulls out a table from under the ring and sets it up…

 

She slowly climbs the steps while staring at the table…?!

 

She is going to the top slowly… she’s commiting wrestling suicide!

 

Bryan tries to stop her.

 

Punk follows up to the ropes.

 

AJ kisses Punk before pushing Punk who then falls into Bryan and BOTH take the table shot!

 

AJ celebrates chanting YES on the ropes!

 

AJ! AJ! AJ!

 

Fuck Kharma its all about AJ!

 

RAW’s USA commercial for going 3 hours. Its pretty funny.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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