Super Smackdown: Blast from the Past Thoughts & Review [April 10, 2012]

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YES! YES! YES! Ryback! Ryback! Ryback! And…Mean Gene Okerlund is wrestling in the main event. This was a long night.

Hampton, VA

Mean Gene interviews Sheamus in the ring. Sheamus apologizes to the ref, all the referees, and the whole WWE universe for his actions. John Laurinaitis comes out and asks him to repeat EVERYTHING he just did because Laurinaitis didn’t hear him. Laurinaitis says that wasn’t good enough and that he’s going to put Sheamus on probation and is fining him $500,000, the largest fine in WWE history. Laurinaitis puts Daniel Bryan and Alberto Del Rio against Sheamus with this partner, wait for it…Mean Gene Okerlund.

~ Out of all the legends available, they pick Mean Gene to wrestle in the MAIN EVENT. It’s gonna be a long night.

They cut to Randy Orton and Cowboy Bob Orton strategizing in the back.

Randy Orton and Mark Henry wrestle to a no-contest when Kane distracts Orton

  • Near the middle of the match, Kane pops up on the video screen and says that he laid out Orton’s father.

~ This was getting good until the Kane drama happened. So the WWE business model is tease the audience with interesting match ups that end with bad finishes and then charge the audience for the same matches with clean finishes on pay per view (and clean finishes only happen occasionally on ppv). Both Henry and Orton looked sharp. I’m wondering who they’re going to pair Mark Henry up with for a meaningful feud.

Millionaire Man Ted DiBiase and Tony Atlas watch a monitor backstage and get excited to see an old fashioned squash match. Local wrestler, Benny Cramer, speaks on the mic and tells the crowd that this is his first Smackdown match. Mother ‘Effin Ryback walks down.

Ryback destroys Benny Cramer with a Running Modified Samoan Drop

~ Next big thing. Period.

Seriously I’m getting a Goldberg/Brock Lesnar feel here. I’d build this dude up for at least 6 months before putting him against higher competition. Since I just stated 6 months, this actually means the WWE is going to pull the trigger on Ryback in 3 months.

Heath Slater tries to convince Tyson Kidd to be his partner. He introduces Jimmy Mouth of the South Hart as their manager tonight.

The Uso’s defeat Tyson Kidd & Heath Slater w/ Jimmy Hart via Superfly Splash on Slater

  • Near the end of the match Mick Foley, who was at the announcing table, gave Jimmy Hart a Socko.

~ Great tag match despite the unnecessary interference. I still like Mick Foley but the WWE is treating him like a footnote in their history instead of an important character and champion. Foley brought a different and smarter audience to pro wrestling. He sold the importance of having an interesting personality with a rich pro wrestling. Mick Foley should be treated as a workingman’s, hardcore Ric Flair and not a novelty act with a forgotten legacy.

Daniel Bryan on Piper’s Pit

Roddy Piper scolds Daniel Bryan for mistreating AJ. Piper brings AJ to the ring. Piper tries to get AJ to badmouth Bryan but she doesn’t. Daniel shuts her down and she leaves the back. Bryan says that he’s getting his World Title rematch at Extreme Rules with a 2 out of 3 falls stipulation. He goes on to add that he gets to pin and submit Sheamus in one match. Piper disagrees and says that he wants to see Sheamus kick Bryan’s head twice. Daniel Bryan slaps the shit out of Piper’s face and leaves the ring.

~ This was the best part of the show. The YES chants were there but they’re were hardly as strong as they were on the infamous RAW after Wrestlemania. It’s a bad thing because I doubt we’re ever going to witness a crowd like that again. Piper was Piper and Daniel Bryan was great as usual; both are good things to be.

Damien Sandow promo. I don’t remember the details of what the said but I hope he can bring it like Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins can. You can fill in their indy names yourself.

Hunico w/ Camacho defeat Hacksaw Jim Duggan via DQ when Duggan used his 2×4 on both men

  • Sgt. Slaughter comes out to join the battle. All hell broke loose and then Duggan got DQ’d. I cared about this so much that I used a cliché.

~ Where has Hunico been? I think the secret to being forgotten by the WWE is to be a good wrestler with average height. That seems to be the common trait among all the misused WWE talent.

Cody Rhodes is in the ring. The American Dream Dusty Rhodes comes out. Big Show imitates Dusty for a little bit and shows a clip of “Dashing” Cody Rhodes putting on lip balm. Cody looks a bit embarrassed and then the Dream starts dancing in the ring as Cody leaves.

~ The Show/Rhodes feud continues and this segment left me wondering if the WWE writing team was under the influence when they wrote this.

Sheamus & Mean Gene Okerlund defeat Daniel Bryan & Alberto Del Rio via Brogue Kick to Daniel Bryan

  • When Mean Gene gets cornered by ADR, DB, and Ricardo Rodriguez, all the legends come out and help the faces. Daniel Bryan looks around, Brogue Kick, and it’s over.

~ Thank god I got this turd out of the way instead of doing this Friday night. Smackdown was so great for three months prior to Wrestlemania and then drop to new lows with this episode. If anything, skip to Ryback’s domination and Daniel Bryan on Piper’s Pit. Have a great week.

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