01-16-12 RAW SUPERSHOW

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RAW is in our backyard but we skipped going to the show to bring you this post… ok, actually we’re saving our cash for WrestleMania this year but it sounded good.

 

Of course being MLK Day we get the video they run every year to open RAW featuring Martin Luther King Jr. They only time the WWE isn’t racist. Fuckers.

 

MICK FOLEY is out to start the show. Lets hope this is a better outing for Foley since his return to the WWE. We get a small Foley chant although a small one. He shills Disneyland (YAY!) and Anaheim. He brings up the shit he’s done since coming back. He explains he didn’t mind doing those things after what he’s done in the WWE like headline WrestleMania in Anaheim. He said he wants his kids to see daddy in the ring one more time and wants into the Royal Rumble! Nice! Vicki and Dolph interrupt with the crowd shitting on Vicki. She intros the next WWE Champion in Ziggler. Ziggler shits on Foley for wanting to take a precious spot in the Rumble just so he can show off to his kids. Dolph makes fun Foley’s chance to win the Rumble. Shit was funny actually. Foley gets serious on wanting to WIN the Rumble not just be in it. Ziggler brings up being in the WWE year round and his current track record before going back to Foley’s chances and how it would suck if he had to defend the WWE Title at Mania against him. Dolph is cutting the promo of his career thus far. Ziggler tells Foley to go away before WWE Champion CM Punk comes out. Punk gets a chant… small. Come on Anaheim. Punk says he and Foley are unconventional not like Ziggler and they don’t hide behind a woman. How he and Foley earned their spots and how Ziggler’s got Laurinaitis in his corner at the ppv. Punk says it would be damn cool to take on Foley at Mania. They argue some more before Laurinaitis comes out and reminds us who he is. Also he claims to be unbiased at the Rumble and will consider Foley’s request then tells him no. Well shit.  Vicki laughs in Foley’s face for an odd long time before it cuts to the former tag team champions Air Boom.

 

WWE Tag Team Champions Epico & Primo w/Rosa vs. Air Boom

-none of the teams get a proper into after the break.

-they show the house show footage of the title switch.

-“you missed out Ryan” is the sign of the night.

-champions take the advantage quick on Bourne off the bat.

-nice hurricaneranna by Bourne for the hot tag.

-near fall similar to last night attempt into the trouble in paradise

-Evan goes for to the top but is distracted watching what was going on with Kofi.

-Evan takes the ropes to the chest then the back stabber for the pin and the win.

Winner: Epico & Primo

 

Johnny Ace is in the back when Otunga walks in, he opens the door and its Jericho who’s in a match tonight. Jericho doesn’t say anything just turns off the lights and stands in the dark with his light up jacket. Haha.

 

Smackdown’s from Vegas this Friday.

 

I still call this arena The Pond. Fuck Honda Center.

 

Ryder is in the back with Eve with his ribs taped up. Striker asks if he’s ready for this tonight. Ryder says he’s going to the ring no matter what. Eve is going with it… oh man this doesn’t sound good for Ryder…

 

Video package on Kane and what has gone on with Ryder’s involvement in this.

 

Jack Swagger w/Vicki vs. Unites States Champion Zack Ryder w/Eve

-Cole shows the footage of last week with the controversial pin.

-right off the bat Swagger attacks Ryder’s taped up ribs.

-Lets go Ryder chant, biggest chant by this crowd.

-back breaker into a Swagger bomb for a 2 count.

-gut wrench powerbomb by Swagger but Zack kicks out.

-another got wrench powerbomb…1..2…kickout!

-multiple elbows to Ryder’s back.

-another gut wrench! 1…2…THREE!

Winner: Jack Swagger is the new US Champion!

 

Interesting… I wonder what the WWE is up to with this? Is the Ryder experiment over?

 

WrestleMania commercial featuring Rock vs. Cena.

 

Recap of Swagger winning the title after three cut wrench suplexes.

 

Ryder is being looked at when Laurnaitis comes in and says “my bad” when he admits that he JUST read the letter from Ryder’s doctor saying he couldn’t compete.

 

Perez Hilton gets the biggest boos of the night. He is guest ring announcing for the Diva’s.

 

Kelly Kelly & Alicia Fox  vs. The Bella’s

-oh man so um Twin magic which sets off Hilton who keeps yelling “you’re cheating, you’re cheating”. This sets up for the roll up win for Kelly & Fox.

Winner: Kelly & Fox

 

This shit gets WORSE! The Bella’s come into the ring and talk shit to Hilton before one of the Bella’s lightly pushes Hilton and he takes the worse slow mo, delayed, overacted back bump in the history of back bumps! Christ where is that rock keep to hide under?

 

Cole and Lawler recap what happened to AJ on Smackdown. Show just runs this bitch over! FUCK! LOL!

 

’92 Royal Rumble recap. This was my personal favorite only because Flair won the WWE Title that night. 😉 Interesting footage to show seeing as he is STILL TNA…

 

R-Truth is out but before he can say anything Wade Barrett comes out. He says he’s winning the Rumble. Barrett mentions Truth being in the Rumble as well. Truth goes into his Ultimate Warrior style promo about Disneyland  and shows a picture of him with Mickey and Minnie, Donald Duck and Pinocchio… Truth says was told by Pinocchio that Wade was winning the Rumble when all of a sudden Pinocchio’s nose grows! Truth then says “I don’t even know if that’s PG!” LOL! Oh shit, not gonna lie that shit made me laugh out loud! Truth says he can believe a talking mouse of an elephant that can fly over Barrett winning the Royal Rumble. HA! Before Truth can finish the Miz comes out and beats on Truth. Barrett joins in before Sheamus make the safe. Sheamus and Truth stand strong before Teddy Long comes out. He says Johnny Ace is busy so he’s making an over the top rope challenge for tonight between these four.

 

Over the top rope challenge

Miz vs. Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus vs. Truth

-all four pair up in the ring with the person they are currently bickering with.

-Barrett gets thrown out when he gets triple teamed.

-Truth tries to throw Sheamus out but he fights out.

-Truth takes down Sheamus before taking down by Miz.

-Truth gets thrown over by Miz but he makes it to the apron.

-Sheamus takes down a charging Miz.

-Sheamus pounds Miz’s chest to the count of ten.

-brog kick is side stepped and Sheamus almost goes over the top.

-Miz and Sheamus teeter until Truth comes out of nowhere and throws both over the top!

Winner: R-Truth

 

Miz takes a brog kick on the outside to finish the segment.

 

Laurinaitis in the back texting when Cena comes in yelling at what happened to Ryder tonight. Ace makes a match against Swagger and Cena… next!? Odd.

 

United States Champion Jack Swagger vs. John Cena

-no Vicki?

-Cena has his serious face on tonight.

-Cena jumps Swagger before the bell and beats his ass.

-Swagger is taken into the ring post then the announce table.

-the chants finally get loud for the battling chant.

-Swagger’s ass getting beat around ringside when Cena whips him into the steel steps.

-Now Swagger continually takes the steel steps to the head.

-Cena then picks up the steel steps and is going to crush Swagger before Kane’s music hits.

-Cena stops and goes to the ring only to get Kane on video. Kane says Cena is finally getting it.

Winner: no contest

 

Cena then realizes the errors of his ways just now before we go to break. Shame on you sir!

 

Brodus Clay vs. JTG

-Clay gets intro’d by his dance crew ladies.

-someone call my momma!

-Clay’s doing raptor arms! What the fuck!? haha

-dude at ringside tries to start a JTG chant…

-Clay is doing Dusty straight on.

-running headbutt by Clay.

-t bone suplex by Clay.

-splash in the corner into the high cross body for the pin. Aka “ah funk it”…!?

Winner: Brodus Clay

 

Clay and his ladies dance after the match… man, maybe this really is it for Clay. Like this is the shit that is going to get his ass over…

 

Another recap of last Smackdown’s main event and AJ taking the Big Show bump. Great facial expressions by Bryan. Here is comes, I hope you’re ready WWE cause Bryan on a national level is DANGEROUS son!

 

World Champion Daniel Bryan is out to the stage. He gets a mixed (by booed) reaction. He talks shits on Big Show and what he did to AJ. He says she will never be the same. He calls Show pathetic for putting her in front of him and the title. How he didn’t apologize and fake cried. Bryan tells Show not to show up to Smackdown anymore or he is going to make him pay. The then says he has a match against Henry on Friday night and he dedicates that match to AJ. He says he appreciates AJ loving him and will show her how much he does in that match. nice shit here!

 

World Champion Daniel Bryan, Chris Jericho & WWE Champion CM Punk & vs. Mark Henry, David Otunga & Dolph Ziggler w/Vicki

-lights go out for Jericho’s entrance and we get a solid reaction from Anaheim!

-Jericho is slapping hands with the crowd again.

-Jericho is now taking pictures OF the crowd with their own camera’s before we go to break.

-we’re back from break and Jericho is STILL going around the crowd.

-The heels are in the ring already but Punk is the last to be intro’d

-Y2J chant. is it too early for Jericho to be in a match?

-Punk and Ziggler start off to a Punk chant.

-tag to Bryan who fucks up clearing Ziggler, fuck!

-tag to Otunga… he works over the leg.

-Y2J chant.

-Bryan is trending… can’t be good.

-Ziggler back in to work on Bryan’s leg.

-Bryan gets to the ropes after a Ziggler half crab.

-tag to Punk and Otunga.

-you can’t wrestle chant for Otunga.

-Ziggler back in thankfully. He puts the books to Punk.

-Punk goes to make the hot tag but Ziggler keeps him in and tags to Otunga.

-Otunga puts Punk on the top for a super plex attempt that is fought off into a Macho Man elbow.

-crowd is going nuts and Y2J is finally tagged in who then goes into his crowd pumping thing.

-Jericho tags Bryan in then leaves while still “celebrating”.

-commercial break.

-The match is officially a 2 on 3. Well, its still a 2 on 2 with Henry just hanging out

-another hot tag this time into Punk.

-high knee into bulldog by Punk on Ziggler.

-springboard clothesline for a close 2 that Henry breaks up.

-Henry finally gets involved and brawls with Bryan up the ramp.

-Mick Foley’s music then hits! He says he’s in the match!

-Foley chant!

-Punk tries for the tag but gets a leg drop to the back of the head for a 2 count.

-Foley chant is constant.

-Ziggler with a series of neck breaks for another 2 count.

-hot to Foley who unloads on Otunga in the corner!

-running knee by Foley!

-DOUBLE UNDERHOOK DDT!

-MR. SOCKO!!!! The crowd is bonkers!

-Foley wins!

Winner: Chris Jericho, Mick Foley, Punk & Bryan

Laurnaits is out again and says he never gave Foley permission to be in the match. Ace reverses the decision.

Winner: Henry, Otunga & Ziggler

Punk takes the mic away from Ace. Punk tells Laurinaitis he isn’t going to do shit and tells him to get his balls out of his purse! Punk then shits on Ace’s career and how it must have bugged him when he wasn’t like his brother, Road Warrior Animal. Punk shit’s on Ace saying that he went from sucking to sucking up. Punk says Ace is jealous of what Punk has become cause he couldn’t. Punk goes off on Ace and tells him if he costs him the title he’s going to kick his ass. Punk chant. Punk then makes Ace flinch before he leaves!

 

Foley is left in the ring with Ace. Laurinaitis introduces himself to us…!? He says he is no pathetic and wont be intimidated. Foley tells Ace to admit that he is going to he is going to screw Punk and gets called a kiss ass. You suck chant. Ace then questions who Foley thinks he is and that he IS going to screw Punk and blows up all over all of us. He still fumbles his words. Laurinitis then winds up and takes the mic to Foley’s head… this was a Perez Hilton looking swing by Ace. Haha

 

Good lord am I just drunk or was this damn good night of RAW with a little bit here of them pushing the envelope?? Why can’t they do this all the time!?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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One Response to “01-16-12 RAW SUPERSHOW”

  1. Zank Says:

    I don’t know where to start on how awesome Big Brodus Clay is

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