09-05-11 RAW SUPERSHOW

by

 

More Triple, Kevin Nash and CM Punk drama. Del Rio spends the night trying to solicit cronies and the man of steel can’t be phased… ugh.

Show starts off with a recap of the Triple H/CM Punk/Kevin Nash shenanigans… this is a really long intro.

 

Hey look for the first time in at least in a month Triple H doesn’t start the show, instead we get CM Punk thankfully.

 

Punk tells us he’s “different” than everyone else and how that makes him a target cause he pisses people off. He says how he wants to kick Kevin Nash and then goes into shit talking his music and hair dye. Haha Punk then says how he isn’t buying that Nash and Triple H aren’t on the same page then calls out Nash who finally comes out, he does whatever he wants… Punk then calls Nash all the gimmicks he’s had over the years and even brings up Super Shredder. Haha He then shits on when Nash was irrelevant. As Nash slowly comes close to the ring we get HHH, who then gets an ear full from Nash about getting rid of Punk. HHH then comes into the ring and said he found out what went down with video footage from the Staple Center here in LA. HHH then blames Nash for his own text and he admits it…!? what? Nash sent his own text…? HHH says he doesn’t like Punk but he doesn’t lie to him and seems like he’s about to get rid of Nash when Nash stops him and doesn’t believe that HHH is picking Punk and asks him if this is all about that push last week? Nash keeps pushing HHH until he gets punched down by HHH and Kevin Nash gets fired! Well this is moving really fast… Punk laughs while telling Nash “best of luck with your future endeavors! Not sure what we accomplished here.

 

SO if HHH and Punk are kinda “cool” now why are we having this match?

 

John Laurinaitis tries to stop Nash but then gets in the car with him. shady.

 

WWE Tag Team Champions Air Boom vs. Jinder Mahal & Great Khali. When they mentioned talent would be on the same shows, I didn’t think they were talking about Khali & Mahal… Evan and Jinder start the match, Mahal needs to stop thinking about his moves so much and work on being more fluid. Anyhow Khali accidentally hits Mahal with the chop to the head setting up for Bourne’s shooting star press for the win. Winners: Air Boom

 

Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez show up in the back. Looks like someone has cleared up his visa issues.

 

Diva’s Champion Kelly Kelly is heading to commentary… oh yay… you really don’t realize the ass on this child until she’s wearing a dress. Holy Christ.

 

#1 contender for the Diva’s Title: Eve vs. Beth Phoenix w/Natalya. Kelly needs not to talk, what the fuck!? Natalya ends up on commentary which makes Kelly sound even more retarded. I cant even pay attention to this match this is so bad. Anyhow Phoenix win with the implant buster. Winner: Beth Phoenix

 

Natalya hits Kelly from behind before coming into the ring to celebrate with Phoenix.

 

Rock now has 1 million followers on Twitter. Does that come with a cookie?

 

Drew McIntyre sucks up to Christian in the back when Del Rio walks up he wants a moment with Christian, he said that he has no one to blame but Cena about not being World Champion. Christian isn’t having it and doesn’t want to do ADR’s dirty work. Alberto says he’s just stating the facts.

 

Oh look it’s the preview of Chaperone 2. This has to be the worst build of any WWE movie.

 

Truth and Miz do the walk in the back.

 

R-Truth w/The Miz vs. CM Punk. Before the match Truth questions CM Punk being “different” seeing as he’s always spoke the truth. Miz comes out and is using big words with Truth which is confusing him. He then says that Triple H is way over his head with this COO shit and offers to do his job for him and says he and Truth are taking on Air Boom at the ppv and shits on their name. Truth rambles before CM Punk comes out to stop this. I am entertained by Truth and Miz though. Oh hey Punk gets an intro this week! We come back from break to a slow paced match and its dragging. Not what I would expect by these two. NICE superplex from the top by Punk. Miz tries to get involved only to get booted from ringside. Truth tries to capitalize but it turns on him as he gets hit by the G2S for the win. Winner: CM Punk

 

Right after the match Triple H comes down to the ring. Punk stops him and says he isn’t buying this Nash and HHH not getting together. HHH calls Punk Obama then said he changed the match at the ppv because he wants to hurt Punk to a No DQ match. HHH goes to leave and Punk stops him and says that if Punk beats him HHH has to resign as COO. HHH agrees. Punk called HHH the “cerebral ASS-ASS-in.

 

Tyler Reks and Kurt Hawkins in the back with Wade Barrett when Del Rio interrupts this shit. Wade isn’t haven’t Alberto’s shit either.

 

Oh shit, they just aired a commercial for the WWE Network coming in 2012! Fuck I hope this is a good idea and hopefully adds more brands back to the WWE. Come on DirecTV, don’t let me down!

 

Jerry “The King” Lawler & Zack Ryder vs. David Otunga & Michael McGillicutty. Before the match Lawler shits on Otunga & Hennig’s personalities then intros his partner…ZACK RYDER! Promo video with clips of Z Truth Long Island Stories for Ryder before he comes out videoing himself! Haha Strong “lets go Ryder” chant while the former tag team champions keep him cornered. Lawler gets in a quick tag leading to the fist from the 2nd rope and before he can make the pin, Ryder asks for the tag. Ryder gets the Rough Rider and pins Otunga. Winner: Lawler & Ryder

 

Del Rio and Rodriguez now in the back with Ziggler. The Bella’s then show up and suck up to Del Rio but he tells them to bounce for a couple of minutes so he can push Ziggler’s buttons in regards to Cena. Well he sure gave Ziggler something to think about.

 

World Champion Randy Orton does the walk in the back… why does he keep showing up on RAW!? Two champions on one show doesn’t make sense.

 

World Champion Randy Orton vs. Heath Slater. Well this is going to be very one sided… Slater’s music is just god awful! Well they gave Slater a few moments before he got RKO’d for the win. Winner: Randy Orton

 

Ryder in the back with Cena, looks like they are filming his show. He says “what kind of idiot wears glasses inside”… is this his way on talking shit on the Rock!? Lame dude.

 

This ass clown wishes everyone a happy Labor Day before coming to the ring, thanks fuck nuts. Oh no, he gets on the mic before the match… blah blah Alberto Del Rio blah blah not funny jokes blah blah. Rodriguez then intros Del Rio as Cena calls this predictable… Cena… calling someone predictable… wow. Del Rio mentions Rey Mysterio not being around because of him but didn’t want to take Cena out 2 weeks ago because he wants to give Cena a fighting chance. He then intros a group of guys who go to jump Cena.. this would consist of Christian, Ziggler, Swagger and Barrett before we get Riley, Sheamus and Morrison to even things up. This brings out Teddy Long and makes a 4 on 4 elimination match right now! Well this is a match up out of nowhere trying to get the kids over.

 

Elimination Match: Cena, Morrison, Sheamus and Riley vs. Ziggler, Swagger, Christian & Barrett. New shiny pants for Morrison they don’t save him from the sleeper hold then the ankle lock by Swagger for the tap out. Vicki’s out to watch. Swagger and Ziggler keep arguing during the match after numerous blind tags. Swagger makes Riley tap out to the ankle lock. Sheamus gets the brog kick on Wade after a nice exchange. Sheamus is way over. Sheamus and Christian gets counted out when Christian bitch slapped Sheamus. It’s a handicap match if Ziggler and Swagger have to take on Cena alone, their odds aren’t good against Super Cena. This motherfucker hits a double YCSM fist on both Swagger AND Ziggler… sigh. Ziggler gets pinned with an AA, right after that Swagger jumps in and gets the ankle lock on Cena but of course reverses it and gets the STF for the win. Winner: John Cena

 

After the match Del Rio tries to jump Cena only to get an AA. Superman stands tall with his big ol’ stupid shit grin.

 

Ok fuckers I wont be doing my duties for a couple of weeks after today but I’ll be back the last week of September. Show Puma some love as his plate is going to be packed!

 

Until all are one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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