08-08-11 RAW

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Ok its time to see if the WWE can save this Punk vs. Cena match for SummerSlam…

 

Great, Triple H is starting off the show… its all about the game him. He puts over SummerSlam and he’s trying to make it sound more than it is. HHH brings up both Punk and Cena, we get an odd reaction for both. He’s fixing this WWE Champion mess with his match that HE made… yeah we know man, can you speed this shit up? He puts himself over then starts to cut a heelish promo and makes himself the ref for the SummerSlam match, well that didn’t take long to get himself involved… ugh. He puts the WWE Champions in matches tonight, Cena is out and he’s taking on… wait we’re getting Cena and HHH arguing about this ref shit but not on the mic, kinda to themselves but we can overhear them. That was an interesting way to do that. Hm?

 

WWE Champion John Cena vs… Jack Swagger. Come on! This is supposed to be a “big” challenge for the Champion? Not when you have been sleeping on building Swagger up again. We get the “lets go Cena/Cena sucks” chant. Cena has a really ugly dropkick, yeah I bring it up all the time but it needs to brought up, bad. Swagger belly to belly’d the wristband right off Cena. HA! Vader bomb for a 2 count. Anyhow Swagger loses after the AA for the pin.

 

We relive Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart from SummerSlam 91… Christ I been watching this shit forever… am I really a grown ass man still watching this shit!? Fuck man, I guess so… dope match and I think Hennig was even injured during that match. I think he was having back problems…? Crazy.

 

Ricardo Rodriguez intros ADR in the back for an interview. Ha! He says “Chicago” a lot and calls Punk a chicken shit.

 

Truth is starting to sound like George the Animal Steele and the Ultimate Warrior… not making motherfucking sense. “Ain’t nobody friends with spiders” haha!?!

 

The Miz vs. Rey Mysterio Kofi Kingston. Miz jumps Rey before he can come out for their match. Rey takes the big WWE sign in the head a couple of times? Writing off an injured Rey perhaps? Miz still comes down to the ring and Cole interviews him… Miz reminds us that he’s all over the place and did that to Rey so he can get a little attention since no one was noticing. He wants a ref to come down and name him the winner… ref comes down and wont raise his hand and tells Justin Roberts to announce that HHH put Miz in another match with… Kofi Kingston… oh that will show Miz… another guy in the same boat as Swagger. Damn springboard crossbody by Kofi off the top rope, SOLID! Miz gets the pin after the SCF, good match.

 

Punk does the walk until Josh comes up and asks him about HHH being the ref at the ppv. He isn’t surprised at all. He’s taking on ADR tonight, this should hopefully be a solid match.

 

WWE Champion CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio. “Punk” chant and a decent pop for him. I still miss his old theme but this ones dope. At least Punk gets a better pushed opponent.  Punk takes the corner post mid match for ADR to focus on. Cole gives us the “longest running episodic” line, I don’t recall hearing that in a while… still annoying. Stiff fall to the outside by ADR. Springboard clothesline by Punk, I still cringe for that move. Ha! Back cracker by ADR for a 2 count. ADR takes a stiff go to sleep for the Punk win. Good match.

 

They recap the diva shenanigans from last week…

 

Beth Phoenix vs. Eve. Eve has new music… its not good. Phoenix beats on Eve for most of the match. After the match Phoenix talks shit about the stupid moves the “divas” do like the stink face and booty popping. Kelly Kelly ends up hitting Phoenix from behind on her way to check on Eve…

 

They recap some award show that the WWE had people at and motherfucking Cena comes out in an Adidas jump suit… fuck you. Cena tries to make jokes about winning for wearing jorts…

 

United States Champion Dolph Ziggler w/Vicki vs. Alex Riley. Riley’s got breath jokes for Vicki. Har har. Sloppy spine buster by Riley. Vicki comes into the ring and slaps Riley for the DQ finish. Dolph is yelling at her when Riley hit Dolph and he goes into Vicki knocking her down. Wah wah. Pull the trigger on Vicki and Dolph already, if you’re going to separate them just do it.

 

A recap of the Money in the Bank match between Cena and Punk with a voice over kind of like the old pieces for the NFL. It might be the NFL guy seeing as he might need a job with this NFL lockout shit… or is that over?! Good recap but man it makes this angle seem even more rushed.

 

R-Truth vs. John Morrison. High paced match from the get go leading to JoMo’s dive to the outside, impressive corkscrew dive. Oh shit Truth sweeps Morrison’s legs while he was on the barricade and Morrison takes the top of the barricage to the neck!… correction, in the slow-mo it was upper back. Truth pins Morrison like no big deal after the lie detector. Did this kid piss someone off!? Super lack luster return.

 

Next week Mysterio either takes on Punk or Cena for the title in San Diego.

 

World Champion Christian in the back. He cuts a promo about some announcement he’s going to make on Friday…

 

Table set up in the ring and HHH and John Laurinaitis. Punk comes out first followed by Cena. Both titles are on the table as the two champions sit. Punk cuts off HHH midsentence, he says this signing is all for show because these never end well. Haha! He shit’s on HHH’s straight-to-DVD movie then cuts to that video from The Rock that went around a month or so ago when he was on set cutting a promo on Cena. Shit’s still dope. Punk then agrees with Rock about Cena being a phony… just like the Rock. Cena says Rock ain’t got shit to complain about and he doesn’t know why Rock has a problem with him. Cena says maybe he’s too PG for Punk or maybe too Hulk Hogan for Punk. Cena FINALLY admits he cannot win over “the millions”! Cena says he IS like the Yankees cause they are loved and hated. He says so many people hate him but he ain’t concerned about them he’s concerned about the people that have been behind him since day one. How there is nothing phony about that. Cena then calls out Punk on him being a hypocrite and HHH joins in on shitting on Punk. Both agree he’s a gutless phony. Punk then brings the firings the WWE just did and how Laurinaitis fired them and how HHH didn’t do it to their faces so no one is more gutless than HHH. Punk brings it back to Cena and says he looks down on people. He says years ago he won the ECW Title and Cena said some bullshit to him. How Cena patted him on the back and said “hey champ I almost gave up on you.” Punk didn’t like it and how Cena moved to LA to be a body builder but HE has been a wrestler since day one. This is good shit here folks! “CM Punk” chant! Punk said 7 years ago Cena won his first WWE Title in LA but on Sunday he’s leaving with nothing! Solid fucking promo! Cena says Punk has no idea how much pressure he has on him and if Punk has thought about what if he loses at SummerSlam. How HE needs this match more than anything because ultimately Cena is still getting Rock at WrestleMania. And how if he doesn’t win he’s just going to be a one hit wonder. Punk looks pensive. Punk says he’s rather be a one hit wonder than a phony. Cena stands up to start shit, table is over and both jaw jack but Laurinaitis and HHH take the accidental hit from behind. Oh the tension to end the show.

 

I have to say I rather enjoyed that segment and helped get over this match at SummerSlam but still… I would have had them make this last longer.

 

 

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2 Responses to “08-08-11 RAW”

  1. Zank Says:

    shit… I never wanted that damn ice cream bar more then now

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