08-01-11 RAW


Two WWE Champions and one predictable outcome to that issue…

We start with a recap video of the CM Punk saga from when he wont the WWE Title at Money in the Bank. They then show Cena winning the title from Mysterio and completely bypass the tournament… ugh. Then we get Punk returning and standing face to face with Cena while Cult of Personality plays.


They cut to the arena to what sounded like the end of a CM Punk chant. Michael Cole states that for the first time ever we have TWO legitimate WWE Champions… not really, we have CM Punk. If Cena would have gone on to defend the title for a couple of ppv’s we might have had two. That would have given him a little bit of stake in shit.


CM Punk starts the show by coming down. Fuck Michael Cole is on commentary with Lawler and JR. Maybe Michael Cole can go on to manage the leaderless Nexus. Solid reaction for Punk with a few boos. He declares “the champ is here” which got a mixed reaction but then we get a solid CM PUNK chant. He sits in the middle of the ring and says the 64 thousand dollar question why he came back… uh, is that all you make homie?! I make MORE than CM Punk?! Geez… He said he loves the place he works but hates the people in charge and had to make a choice. He chose to speak his mind and caused a bit of change. He brings up Vince being “relieved” and wants to take a little bit of credit for that but that us fans have to take a big part of that credit and wants to make this fun again for everyone. He said the voice of the voiceless needed to be heard and he cant do it on a megaphone, comic con or Jimmy Kimmel and that he can’t help those changes sitting on his couch. He made the call to come back. He then shits on Cena being “WWE Champion”. He said Cena is no different than the guy in the front row with the “belt” because what he has is a “championship title”, DOPE! CM PUNK chant. He says that no matter what the fact is HE holds the most important title in the world which says that HE is the best professional wrestler this world has to offer. He is the one and only WWE Champion. This then brings out HHH and Punk says “I guess its time to play the game”. Haha. HHH comes out in his suit looking stiff. He gets a “Triple H” chant. Punk says H-H-H is the C-O-O. haha HHH says he wanted to come out and say why he resigned Punk and said it was good for business just like bringing back Morrison and JR. The universe wanted it and he gave us what we wanted. He said they wanted CM Punk and he put his personal feelings aside and signed him. Punk brings up him saying “personal feelings” and wants to know what that means. HHH says he’s smug, overrated and hypes himself too much. Punk said it must be like looking in the mirror huh Triple H? haha Punk said he wished HHH said he hated his guts. He brings up Batista, Foley, Jericho and Lesnar bouncing because of Vince’s mistakes and how HHH couldn’t afford Punk go somewhere else. HHH wants Punk to tell us the truth on why he resigned and how he did it for him because he wanted to hear his own voice and how if a pipe bomb goes off and no one hears it, who cares. How he did this for a big ego, Punk said that’s 50/50 and that the truth is he is the WWE Champion. HHH said Cena is also the WWE Champion and how he is going to fix that situation later tonight. HHH goes to leave but Punk stops him and says he isn’t changing just cause he resigned and he is going to do things HIS way. He bows at “Hunter Hearst Helmsley” and him hogging the spotlight over others. When he was carrying HBK’s bags he’d still tell people what to do. He brings up Steph and how he talks shit while they are in bed. He calls HHH a bully who likes to push people and says be careful who he pushes because he likes to push back. HHH said he’s got a massive ego and its telling him to slap the tattoo’s off of him but he isn’t going to do that because this is bigger than that and he took the job for…. us. BAH! He said that comes with rules and he isn’t going to break those rules. He tells Punk to not break those rules either. Punk asks.. or what? and taunts him and asks if he needs his wife’s permission first. Haha! Punk then bounces while HHH jaws off at Punk.


I thought that was a solid opener, good shit.


Rey in the back getting ready when Morrison comes up out of nowhere. They are teaming up tonight.


Oh great a Diva’s battle royal for the #1 contender spot… forward job… this shit got a commercial break! BAH!… Beth Phoenix wins! Well, shit. Kelly comes in to celebrate with her and that lasts a second before Phoenix beats the shit out of her! NICE! She then gets on the mic, stands over Kelly and says her days of her perky bimbo shit is over. Solid, maybe now I’ll pay attention to this shit.


Miz in the back with Truth and his invisible posse show up. Miz asks him who Truth is talking to and he doesn’t know what he is talking about. Haha. They bring up HHH being in charge and truth says it’s a conspiracy. They argue but then Truth is the voice of reason and says if HHH was bringing back Punk why did they have them fight in a tournament… its what we was thinking too. I think Truth won over Miz.


Josh in the back with WWE Champion John Cena. Josh brings up what Punk had to say and Cena goes right for HHH saying he wants to hear what he has to say about the WWE Champions.


R-Truth & Miz vs. Rey Mysterio & John Morrison. They recap Miz on the George Lopez before the match. Does anyone besides the people in the crowd actually watch that show?! Watching Miz taking on Morrison seems strange when Miz has lapped Morrison twice. Lot’s of dives to the outside from Rey and Morrison and yet ANOTHER commercial…!? Miz pulls Truth out before Morrison can hit the “delayed” starship pain. Morrison ends up taking the Mic Check for the Truth pin after Miz threw Rey over the barricade. Welcome back Morrison… After the match Miz hit the SCF on Morrison and Truth hit John with a bottle of water. Well at least they kept Morrison strong… oh wait.


Josh is now in the back with HHH. HHH has jokes for Josh then goes into CM Punk and him talking about his wife and how people have been taking jabs at that for 10 years. He said anyone can come out when he announces what he is going to do and that Cena should remember that this is “strictly business”… I smell a swerve here.


Is Sheamus a face now?! Fuck I need to catch Smacky from Friday already.


SummerSlam moment of the night Honky Tonk Man losing the I-C Title to the Warrior in a couple of seconds. Have you ever heard the rumors that it was HTM that wanted this match short cause he didn’t want to get hurt by that big goof? Haha funny.


United States Champion Dolph Ziggler and Vicki Guerrero comes out all dressed up in black. Vicki does he line then says that while people are worried about having TWO WWE Champions, Ziggler has proved to be more superior than CM Punk. Ziggler brings up saying “follow that” last week after winning his match and how that is a notice to anyone on the roster. How he is more of a man that anyone… this brings out Alex Riley who gets a decent pop. He craps on Vicki who is getting booed out of the building. She brings up what she’s done for Ziggler like getting him to the World, I-C and US titles. Riley calls Ziggler out and asks him when was the last time he did something on his own and if he wants to be a real man to drop Vicki… this shit again!? He then says if he doesn’t he’s just a bleach blond, arrogant fraud. Ziggler then loosens up his tie like he’s gonna do some shit but bounces while saying he doesn’t even know who (Riley) is.


Split screen with Santino & Ryder doing the walk while Hennig and Otunga do the same… didn’t Ryder get a new (stupid) job!?


WWE Tag Team Champions David Otunga & Michael McGillicutty vs. Santino & Zack Ryder. SO it looks like the Nexus is officially DEAD. No mention of the group and the shirts, music and intro video are gone. RIP. Large “we want Ryder” chant! Cole shits on Zyder’s “internet championship”. When did Santino get a snake sock!? Haha Oh well… the tag champs pin Ryder. Yeah, these are great changes WWE… ugh. Come on man that kid was getting a massive pop here! Wake the fuck up already before you blow it like you did on Kofi… and we know he hasn’t recovered fully after that shit.


WWE.com is doing a poll asking who the real WWE Champion is… I don’t mean to be Captain Obvious but come on… kiddies are going to pick superman.


Josh now in the back with WWE Champion CM Punk, he’s asked about HHH’s decision. He said he’s waiting to hear as well and how he was testing HHH earlier and he passed with flying colors. How he beat Cena at MITB so the champ is HERE.


Ricardo Rodriguez is out to intro Alberto Del Rio. CLASSIC gangster Rolls Royce. Glad their keeping a theme with the cars lately and sticking to one brand. Cole says the car is worth one hundred thousand… maybe but I would google that.


Alberto Del Rio vs. Evan Bourne. Fast start from Bourne is stopped even faster. Oh my god! Bourne goine for the shooting star when ADR runs up the ropes for the flash kick to the back of Bournes head… OH THE TOP ROPE! So fucking dope! He locks on the arm breaker for the tap out win. He locks it on again after the match… annnnd Kofi makes the save… He actually gets a solid chant from the crowd.


JR brings up that ADR currently has TWO choices to cash in on, this is very true sir.


Cena got 54% of the votes, figures…


HHH comes back out and brings up having 2 WWE Champions, Cena’s name gets booed more so than Punk’s name. He said he is going to… then Johnny Ace comes out to the ring…!? He intro’s himself to the crowd and reminds us of his title and says he took the job over from JR. HHH isn’t nice to him and asks him what he wants. Ace says HHH has been corporate for a short time but that he has worked side by side with Vince for 10 years. Ace wants HHH to strip the title from John Cena, shit dudes right. This of course brings out head assclown, John Cena. He’s getting mostly booed now. Cena shit’s on Ace and brings up Punk being right about him kissing Vince’s ass. Cena’s got jokes. Cena says Ace is mad cause Cena knocked him on his ass at the MITB ppv. He said he doesn’t want a goof who use to carry a skate board dictating what happens to his title. Ace says he made his decision because Punk beat Cena. Cena brings up again how he punched him at the ppv and how he is going to do it again. HHH doesn’t get in the way of this and Ace bounces. So what was the use of that!? Cena tries to plead his case and HHH says his claim to the title is legit and he ain’t stripping him. He said he didn’t hear from Punk until Cena was wrestling Rey last week and he isn’t going to strip YOU of the title, implying he is going to strip Punk. WWE Champion CM Punk then comes back out he said he’s seen the writing on the wall and now that he’s officially back (CM PUNK chant) he is going to strip him of the title?! How everything is going to go back to same shit. HHH stops both of them from talking and corrects Cena that its not Hunter, he’s his boss. HHH sets up Title vs. Title at SummerSlam as predicted… HHH bounces leaving these two in the ring together. They stare at each other, the Punk raised the WWE Title followed by Cena raising his belt. Every time they raise their respective belts their music hits. They keep going back and forth and the show ends with them still going to the ring posts raising there titles.


I don’t know man, without CM Punk on this show and his promos this was a subpar show and they are going to go back to same ol’ shit at SummerSlam with Cena winning the match and probably losing it to Del Rio sending Punk back to, once again the same ol’ shit. Way to go WWE, I don’t have faith in you.

Job Ryder, job Morrison… nice touches…


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2 Responses to “08-01-11 RAW”

  1. Zank Says:

    beth is back on raw, long island iced z on tv, awesome HHH-Punk segment, dolph vs. a-ry… I’m happy 🙂

  2. Mascara De Fuego Says:

    I am glad they are going back to making Beth a heel, she is a much stronger character that way. Hopefully she can be focused on again properly in the absence of Kharma.

    Ryder on TV is great and the crowd reaction was awesome but they need to realize they need to juice this to the fullest extent.

    I did enjoy the interaction between HHH and Punk looking back but I hope the end result benefits Punk’s character and he isn’t used just to get Triple H over. His role has changed and they need to get him over in that manner.

    thanks for continually following Zank, much appreciated!


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